Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

VenusBlue

Search for a member

VenusBlue
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 568
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

VenusBlue's last visitors

JonnyBoy18jakeaniteriFollowYouLeadAussieGamermandii_xpsuckmysarcasmralletsvelvelbananamanamagrvNSPrincess

VenusBlue's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

VenusBlue's favorite FMLs

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

#8905229
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6552) - you deserved it (23659)

On 03/07/2010 at 10:08pm - misc - by Numbnuts (man) - United States (California)

Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumps on my lap and vomits all over my doughnuts, stares at me then bites the doughnut out of my hand. FML

#5522112
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32766) - you deserved it (3711)

On 09/28/2009 at 2:41am - animals - by Heww (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML

#5504696
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32433) - you deserved it (13538)

On 09/27/2009 at 11:52am - misc - by cockroach (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a medical bill because my daughter thought it would be hilarious to try and fit her fist in her mouth. She succeeded in getting it in, but not in getting it out. FML

#3907328
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37142) - you deserved it (3012)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:10pm - health - by KnuckleSandwich (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I reached into my fridge to grab a strawberry soda. I noticed the can had started to leak from the top so I slurped up the spilt red liquid on the top of the can. I realized it wasn't soda, but blood from a defrosting steak on the shelf above it. FML

#2929872
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47282) - you deserved it (20155)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by kjmsit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I brought back the puppy I adopted for my family. I spent months doing all the research on puppy care with two young children, and at least five hundred dollars for the dog, the supplies, toys... the whole bit. Turns out everyone's allergic to her. FML

#1386649
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44552) - you deserved it (7442)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:52am - animals - by achoo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

#615927
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12967) - you deserved it (56912)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML

#506180
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55780) - you deserved it (15498)

On 03/21/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by teriyaki124 - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: