Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

VasilisaUzhasnaj

Search for a member

VasilisaUzhasnaj

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9232
  • Number of comments : 735
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About VasilisaUzhasnaj : Soviet weeaboo artist.

www.euronova.tumblr.com

www.no-totoro-rious.tumblr.com

VasilisaUzhasnaj's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:07pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:18am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 7:10pm<b>liamfitz6</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:33am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 8:54am<b>hailey2649</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 6:34pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:28pm<b>423</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:49pm<b>deltaknight055</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:07pm<b>Lars93</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:59pm<b>johnfolk</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:56pm<b>valentino_minks</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:12pm<b>Skyzeri</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:04pm<b>AlexKing17</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:38am<b>ComradeNeal</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 3:09am<b>blurider17</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:27am<b>JKROB</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:08am<b>recklessryan</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:54pm

VasilisaUzhasnaj's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of VasilisaUzhasnaj's badges

VasilisaUzhasnaj's favorite FMLs

Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML

#19472995
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37608) - you deserved it (2735)

On 04/15/2012 at 2:43pm - intimacy - by jonasister (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML

#19470804
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31695) - you deserved it (12251)

On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to be kind to animals and get my dad to buy cage-free eggs. When I told him it was dollar more, he started yelling and making a scene in the middle of the store, saying that chickens are ugly and they deserve to suffer. FML

#19469757
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24106) - you deserved it (5738)

On 04/14/2012 at 11:46pm - misc - by ilovechickens - United States

Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML

#19468154
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18066) - you deserved it (10592)

On 04/14/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by fuckbucket14 - Egypt (Al Bahr al Ahmar)

Today, I surprised my daughter by telling her that I'm going to treat the family to a trip to the Himalayas in a few months. She promptly threw a tantrum and listed her main reasons for not wanting us to go: "It's a freaking desert there," and, "I'll miss the new Spiderman movie." FML

#19463259
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22481) - you deserved it (3685)

On 04/13/2012 at 9:01pm - kids - by neverakid (man) - United States

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

#19455929
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14454) - you deserved it (34331)

On 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

#19455819
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28951) - you deserved it (19185)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

#19454925
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22438) - you deserved it (12155)

On 04/12/2012 at 9:47am - misc - by Holls (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

#19449472
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13865) - you deserved it (36190)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML

#19440053
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23788) - you deserved it (2787)

On 04/09/2012 at 10:51pm - health - by emoflowers - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

#19438168
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22275) - you deserved it (2517)

On 04/09/2012 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML

#19435990
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16934) - you deserved it (8255)

On 04/09/2012 at 11:22am - animals - by Ew. (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the side walk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

#19434404
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18598) - you deserved it (4941)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by sydstreet - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML

#19430484
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21599) - you deserved it (4606)

On 04/08/2012 at 2:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was getting out of the shower, I saw a spider climb into the ceiling vent. Wanting it to come out so I could kill it, I turned on the fan. It came out, along with a dozen of its friends. FML



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: