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Vanyaxe

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Vanyaxe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1586
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 13 posted

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Vanyaxe's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

#15251032 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (40504) - you deserved it (3304)

On 03/09/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by crazystar69 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a little boy called me on the phone, crying "grandma died" in a broken voice. I just didn't have the heart to say "wrong number." FML

#15250352 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (34372) - you deserved it (2974)

On 03/09/2011 at 10:47am - kids - by Waffle -

Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for 'the trouble' I caused. FML

#15247228 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (29267) - you deserved it (2429)

On 03/09/2011 at 12:36am - work - by Cashier (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was finally able to get up and take a shit after being bedridden due to my knee surgery. I had diarrhea and because I can't properly bend my knee, I can't wipe my butt. FML

#15207918 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (23776) - you deserved it (2627)

On 03/05/2011 at 4:53pm - health - by 092492 - United States (California)

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

#15207309 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (32987) - you deserved it (2515)

On 03/05/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by devinbyrne - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML

#15195848 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (23822) - you deserved it (2308)

On 03/04/2011 at 11:25am - misc - by carr (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents told me that due to my lacking height and weight, I legally have to sit in a booster seat in the car from now on. I'm nineteen. FML

#15188063 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (35601) - you deserved it (3724)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059 (299)

I agree, your life sucks (29855) - you deserved it (17305)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while riding the bus to a really important job interview the child sitting next to me threw up in my lap. His mother then told him to wipe his mouth. He used my sleeve. FML

#15179914 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (2239)

On 03/02/2011 at 9:49pm - kids - by elfy2 -

Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML

#15178043 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (27121) - you deserved it (3014)

On 03/02/2011 at 7:35pm - work - by Worstjob (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was out skating with a guy I really like. I put on my best moves, to impress him. I ended up slicing his lip open with my skate mid-jump. His lip is now wired shut by twelve stitches. FML

#15176511 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (11810) - you deserved it (22781)

On 03/02/2011 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML

#15174251 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (25064) - you deserved it (4311)

On 03/02/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML

#15170920 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (29014) - you deserved it (2227)

On 03/02/2011 at 12:24am - misc - by Acesup111 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML

#15166184 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (25566) - you deserved it (1967)

On 03/01/2011 at 7:11pm - health - by stillsick (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919 (368)

I agree, your life sucks (13391) - you deserved it (64136)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)



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