Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Vanillalife

Offline (the 09/01/2015 at 11:37pm) | Search for a member

Vanillalife

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 January 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 968
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Vanillalife : Hey there... I'm just a frequent FML reader. This site always manages to cheer me up on a bad day and I love it! :)

Vanillalife's page activity

Visits<b>dreamrules</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:23am<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:55pm<b>jaysongary11</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 11:19am

Vanillalife's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Vanillalife's badges

Vanillalife's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I won a 20 000 dollar scholarship. After celebrating with my family by jumping around the room for a half-hour, we realized it was addressed to someone else with the same last name. When we called to tell her, she said it was weird because she had received my rejection letter. FML

#318702
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (174485) - you deserved it (21548)

On 03/14/2009 at 9:44am - money - by stillpoor (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML

#265039
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (253515) - you deserved it (16480)

On 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by TuralSucks (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was walking along the street and passed a young couple. Over my shoulder I heard the girl say to her boyfriend "Would you still love me if I looked like her?" FML

#232729
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (177749) - you deserved it (11412)

On 03/07/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by Pissed Off (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML

#231694
163 comments

Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

#217348
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (510999) - you deserved it (50327)

On 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

#163689
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (352449) - you deserved it (31099)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm - love - by loser (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
1019 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77262) - you deserved it (774382)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1220536) - you deserved it (135252)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

#97632
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (281583) - you deserved it (63730)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by GD (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
791 comments

I agree, your life sucks (817253) - you deserved it (89255)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (252836) - you deserved it (86625)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

#29912
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (173948) - you deserved it (50073)

On 02/12/2009 at 2:45am - misc - by alhummel21 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML

#12567
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (305202) - you deserved it (55603)

On 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by hahahehehohohoo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (297347) - you deserved it (28458)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: