Valentina_Baby

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Valentina_Baby

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 14 February 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12159
  • Number of comments : 139
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Valentina_Baby : hi ^-^

Valentina_Baby's page activity

Visits<b>vincentjules</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 7:04am<b>angrykid11</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 10:15pm<b>lungjiao</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:38pm<b>Siehnados</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 11:31pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 11:58pm<b>MethuselahTurtle</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 6:31pm<b>whatahatuis</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 12:27pm<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 4:51pm<b>jman1324</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 1:28pm<b>Kindeyu1005</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 5:17am<b>JohnnyDontCare</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 12:35pm<b>sureshadow</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 7:12pm<b>Hunter_the_Ninja</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 12:48am<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 12:17pm<b>MissingVampire25</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 11:48am<b>AscendV</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 9:45pm<b>mufufuffu</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:15pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 9:42am

Fucked!<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 10:51pm<b>Kindeyu1005</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 11:17am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 10:43pm<b>_cameronkc_</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 3:22pm<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 6:35pm

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Valentina_Baby's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML

by box bulge / 10/20/2011 at 9:24pm / China / Health

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

by pokeballbra / 10/17/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

by blarp / 10/17/2011 at 12:20am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, it turns out that my hairy feet are the most memorable part about me. My family's named me "the hobbit". FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2011 at 6:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML

by John W. / 10/12/2011 at 8:37am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I left my window open while practicing the saxophone. My drunk neighbours showed their appreciation for the music with a well-aimed firecracker that set my mattress on fire. My landlord has threatened to evict me as she thinks I set it off. FML

by ItaliczZz / 10/12/2011 at 4:13am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2011 at 1:14am / United States (Virginia) / Animals