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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Vagabones

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Vagabones
  • Town/Country : St. Louis, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25490
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Vagabones : Just a college student, bored out of my tit.

Vagabones's last visitors

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Vagabones's favorite FMLs

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

#2874076 (252)

I agree, your life sucks (31047) - you deserved it (44090)

On 06/14/2009 at 12:14am - intimacy - by BarbieKen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to the doctor and found out that I am infertile. When I called my boyfriend of 2 years (whom I was hoping to have a future with) to talk to him about it, all he said was "So does this mean I don't have to wear a condom anymore?" FML

#1056544 (217)

I agree, your life sucks (48591) - you deserved it (4886)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML

#505547 (367)

I agree, your life sucks (268317) - you deserved it (24541)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:15am - intimacy - by jilted (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend bought me a Nickelback CD. FML

#259596 (408)

I agree, your life sucks (70628) - you deserved it (19660)

On 03/10/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by deez_nutz (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was bagging groceries, I looked down to see a 6-year-old urinating on my shoes and the floor next to me. I told his mother that he should take her kid to the restroom, only to be told to "mind my own goddamn business." I was later fired for arguing with the customer. FML

#256127 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (97492) - you deserved it (3095)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:00pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363070) - you deserved it (401423)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML

#245062 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (53660) - you deserved it (14934)

On 03/08/2009 at 7:57pm - misc - by poop - United States (Ohio)

Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML

#242337 (157)

I agree, your life sucks (51940) - you deserved it (13170)

On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States

Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML

#234028 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (74127) - you deserved it (12054)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

#225509 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (51378) - you deserved it (8277)

On 03/06/2009 at 11:14am - intimacy - by cumguzzler - United States (South Carolina)

Today, a co-worker superior to me called me "Stephanie" yet again. My name is Ashley. I politely informed her that my name is Ashley and subtely pointed to my work ID. Later, I get called into my supervisor's office. I got written up for correcting someone of higher status that I. FML

#219945 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (2140)

On 03/05/2009 at 7:15pm - work - by yankeebelle (woman) - United States (Michigan)