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UnknownTracker's FML badges
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
UnknownTracker's favorite FMLs
Today, my wife said she was going to her friend's place to help her with couponing. She started getting ready at 5pm; shaved her legs, did her hair, put on skin-tight leggings and a low-cut top. Left at 6pm, snuck back in at 2:50am. Shit, couponing must be really exciting. FML
by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:15am / United States (New York) / Love
by hrs220 / 05/21/2016 at 5:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by gavthewarealpaca / 05/16/2016 at 5:36am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by kattylizbeth / 05/14/2016 at 10:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it up due to how utterly terrified she looked. Now no matter what I say, she thinks it's all because her body is hideous. FML
by Anonymous / 04/06/2016 at 12:59pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy
Today, my family and I were laying on my parents' bed watching a movie. My dad wrapped his arm around me and began rubbing my shoulder. That would have been fine, if it actually had been my shoulder and not my boob. Needless to say, we were both mortified. FML
by ScarredDaughter / 03/29/2016 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by sorkin15 / 03/24/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by pancaketits / 03/22/2016 at 11:33am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at work I got a complaint from a guest. She complained that after spending 2 hours to get her hair done for a wedding, she got drenched with water from a child. I work at a WATER PARK. Thank you for calling me a pathetic asshat for no reason in front of other guests. FML
by Anonymous / 03/20/2016 at 6:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by I hate my brother / 03/20/2016 at 2:53pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I joined my boyfriend at a work conference out of state. One of the other conference-goers struck up a conversation and I obliged. Apparently, I was too nice. He followed me into the hotel lobby and openly watched me go back to my hotel room, making sure to count the room numbers. FML
by CreeptacularBait / 03/16/2016 at 5:33pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by Wolf6661 / 03/14/2016 at 2:29pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, my boss - whose intelligence level hovers a hair above "Herpity derpity derp" - got up my ass and accused me of lying to him. All because I said that just because I'm a network admin, I can't make his 7 year old piece of crap Blackberry magically be able to use 4G networks. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2016 at 2:44pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/09/2016 at 8:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous