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UnikornG33K

Offline (the 07/20/2015 at 8:23am) | Search for a member

UnikornG33K

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 12468
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About UnikornG33K : Music, radio, concerts.

UnikornG33K's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of UnikornG33K's badges

UnikornG33K's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

#17250401
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33103) - you deserved it (8253)

On 07/25/2011 at 3:21am - health - by jgdgjyfg - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML

#17248199
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36575) - you deserved it (3141)

On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML

#17197650
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42526) - you deserved it (3749)

On 07/21/2011 at 12:10am - love - by rbeast (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48429) - you deserved it (7833)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML

#17167728
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36147) - you deserved it (12164)

On 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm - kids - by stargirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36608) - you deserved it (7827)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32260) - you deserved it (92330)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home after having traveled abroad for the last two months. Before I left, I'd asked my dad to take care of my fish, and he promised they'd be safe with him. I found them all decomposing. FML

#17055167
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29819) - you deserved it (3325)

On 07/10/2011 at 4:54pm - animals - by worstfatherever - United States

Today, my mother resolved to never visit McDonald's again. Not because of ethics or health concerns, but because they charged her for extra barbecue sauce. She bitched out the man in the drive-through for a good five minutes, while I sat awkwardly in the passenger's seat. FML

#17018036
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29164) - you deserved it (3025)

On 07/07/2011 at 7:07pm - misc - by AgentFreshers (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

#16997621
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8058) - you deserved it (113048)

On 07/06/2011 at 5:17am - health - by Fmylife (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

#16995078
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34143) - you deserved it (5124)

On 07/06/2011 at 1:11am - health - by ChelseaRae (woman) - United States

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

#16995078
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34143) - you deserved it (5124)

On 07/06/2011 at 1:11am - health - by ChelseaRae (woman) - United States

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31749) - you deserved it (5383)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

#16984657
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35984) - you deserved it (4333)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:04am - work - by chawlay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

#16984657
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35984) - you deserved it (4333)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:04am - work - by chawlay (man) - United States (New York)



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