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UnicornsDoExist

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UnicornsDoExist
  • Town/Country : Riedstadt, Germany
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 March 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2094
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About UnicornsDoExist : MOVED TO ACCOUNT : iLaurie

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UnicornsDoExist's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37319) - you deserved it (9473)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

#14090215
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20218) - you deserved it (9967)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31856) - you deserved it (9142)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

#14043132
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52469) - you deserved it (9842)

On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML

#13998291
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24301) - you deserved it (10315)

On 11/27/2010 at 10:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

#13997572
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12340) - you deserved it (30923)

On 11/27/2010 at 7:36am - misc - by Flaps - United States (New York)

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

#13930948
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31238) - you deserved it (4356)

On 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm - animals - by dickwebs - Germany

Today, I asked my boyfriend what celebrity I look like. He thought long and hard, then said "Sarah Jessica Parker." I gasped and told him that I find her extremely hideous. He replied "So do I." FML

#13879750
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28291) - you deserved it (7597)

On 11/17/2010 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what celebrity I look like. He thought long and hard, then said "Sarah Jessica Parker." I gasped and told him that I find her extremely hideous. He replied "So do I." FML

#13879750
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28291) - you deserved it (7597)

On 11/17/2010 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML

#13814299
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16240) - you deserved it (28457)

On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61125) - you deserved it (5803)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

#13245157
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15717) - you deserved it (36853)

On 09/29/2010 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Claire (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML

#13145011
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47430) - you deserved it (3269)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "no", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "deal." FML

#13079046
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32140) - you deserved it (3035)

On 09/16/2010 at 9:30pm - love - by ccblock (man) - United States (Florida)



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