Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/29/2015 at 1:13am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 24 March 1983 (32 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 738
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

UnicornFarts's page activity

Visits<b>CelticKing</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 6:59am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 11:37pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:52pm<b>2potato4u</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 1:50am<b>rejlac</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 12:06pm<b>JOUSH94</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 10:14am<b>skittycat213</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 10:00pm<b>HeavenlyAura</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 5:51pm<b>jordyn20915</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 1:08am<b>ironfey</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:59pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 5:35pm<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 4:31pm<b>bluucat</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:36pm<b>oh_marie_me</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:07pm<b>zoe_nicoleee</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:01pm<b>mylifedeservesit</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 11:16am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 11:05am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 5:59am

UnicornFarts's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of UnicornFarts's badges

UnicornFarts's favorite FMLs

Today,hila having sax with my boyfriand, soma homalas looool parson cama up to tha window and startad doing a voica-ovar. fat FML


I agree, your life sucks (82) - you deserved it (9510)

On 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today , I took a nice relaxing dump at school , in pants , in the middle of class. mega FML


I agree, your life sucks (31639) - you deserved it (7547)

On 02/05/2015 at 3:42pm - misc - by m33p - United States (California)

2day Ma Girlfriend Tougt It Would Be Sexy To Give Me A Naked Massage. Se Straddled Ma Back And Started Rubbing, Ten Se Sneezed And Peed On Me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40361) - you deserved it (4178)

On 02/02/2015 at 11:36pm - love - by bootyislife - United States (Washington)

Today... while trying to take a crap... I shut the bathroom door. A minute later... my 3 year old daughter knocked an said "Mommy... do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30391) - you deserved it (4258)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend 4 the first time in over a month . When I came, I thrust one last time an let out a huge fart . She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, an now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart" . FML


I agree, your life sucks (34199) - you deserved it (6809)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, tings got intimate and we ended up aving sex. After e came, e cuckled to imself and said, "Tat one's 4 you, Nan". real FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and looool got so angry that sha baat ma with it . FML


I agree, your life sucks (46125) - you deserved it (11908)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband an I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child!! The only thing my father did was look at my husband an tell him his pull out game was weak!! FML


I agree, your life sucks (35081) - you deserved it (3433)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30927) - you deserved it (4329)

On 11/08/2014 at 2:36am - love - by sickyandiknowit - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found a book in attic that I always read when I was a kid!! For old times sake I read it again!! On the very first page, child me had written, ( Go to page 15 ) so I did!! On page 15, in big red letters, it said, ( Get bent )!! I got pranked by myself!! big fat FML


I agree, your life sucks (29826) - you deserved it (7896)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made looool up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I got a round of applause. Too looool bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

Today, I found out my grlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smild, held up a closd fist, and said ( Look at the number of fucks I give! ) She then raisd a finger, said ( Oops. Finger spasm! ) then lowerd it again.


I agree, your life sucks (44523) - you deserved it (4596)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my husband an I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like u wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up an saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52434) - you deserved it (6856)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: