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Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (63943) - you deserved it (12825)
On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML
I agree, your life sucks (175221) - you deserved it (25008)
On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (410264) - you deserved it (22765)
On 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm - love - by thankskimi (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I got a $200 ticket mailed to me for drunk driving in Maryland. I have never been pulled over for drunk driving and I have never been to Maryland. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78622) - you deserved it (2854)
On 03/12/2009 at 8:38pm - money - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to prove to my dad that he snores by secretly putting a tape recorder under his bed. I soon found out my parents had sex that night. Apparently, my mom likes to talk dirty. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29427) - you deserved it (76009)
On 03/11/2009 at 2:57pm - intimacy - by Zack (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)
Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59976) - you deserved it (2507)
On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by danesy - United States (New York)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (471093) - you deserved it (584962)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70016) - you deserved it (6289)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:54pm - misc - by missy (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my best friend resolved things with her boyfriend after he had admitted to cheating on her. I felt really guilty because I drunkenly hooked up with her boyfriend last month. She said, "I felt better when he told me that the girl was extremely ugly and bad in bed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10791) - you deserved it (81519)
On 03/09/2009 at 4:52pm - misc - by collegegirl90 - United States (Texas)
Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40329) - you deserved it (7160)
On 03/09/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by McChunky =( - United States (California)
Today, my brother had his fiancée over to meet the whole family. We were having a great time with her, and my mother gushed to her that she was like the daughter she never had. I'm her daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50915) - you deserved it (1920)
On 03/08/2009 at 9:34am - misc - by Noname - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was going over to my friends house for dinner, (it was my birthday) when I walked in everyone yelled surprise and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me she said "wrong person guys, turn off the lights". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48151) - you deserved it (2151)
On 03/08/2009 at 3:16am - misc - by PmS (woman) - United States (Wyoming)
Today, I was driving on the freeway in the back seat of my friends car. I looked over to the left and was greeted by a van full of adolescent boys waving and making the "call me" hand gesture. I then happened to looked down and realized that my right boob was completely out of my top. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12811) - you deserved it (40476)
On 03/08/2009 at 3:11am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47591) - you deserved it (3045)
On 03/07/2009 at 11:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (47961) - you deserved it (14813)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm - kids - by Dang-ItsDanielle (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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