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Ultradmac

Offline (the 08/31/2014 at 8:17am) | Search for a member

Ultradmac

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 276
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Ultradmac's page activity

Visits<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 12:43am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:04am<b>sdess</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:39pm<b>lennelleong</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:28pm<b>SuperdudeGuy</b> - the 02/01/2013 at 8:18pm<b>laurenxxxhacker</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 8:10pm<b>Gestpacho88</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 2:37pm

Ultradmac's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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Ultradmac's favorite FMLs

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34461) - you deserved it (4751)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

#21247445
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32441) - you deserved it (4410)

On 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm - love - by ch4nny (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my manager made everyone put up Christmas decorations around the store. As well as this, we're going to have Christmas music playing on repeat all the way through to January. It's not even September yet. FML

#21247337
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36283) - you deserved it (2420)

On 08/28/2014 at 6:39pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said "nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML

#21247278
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34644) - you deserved it (2758)

On 08/28/2014 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (4763)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, on my first day at as a photo editor at a print store, I had to spend over an hour editing a full shoot of a fat man eating a baguette in a bathtub, closeups included. FML

#21242471
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34513) - you deserved it (3196)

On 08/21/2014 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36950) - you deserved it (6701)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

#21241880
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41467) - you deserved it (6834)

On 08/20/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42602) - you deserved it (7410)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40268) - you deserved it (5321)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML

#21239602
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44099) - you deserved it (4833)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, it's my birthday. When I asked my mom if we were gonna do anything special for my birthday. She said, "don't lie to me. It's not your birthday." FML

#21238688
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43610) - you deserved it (2896)

On 08/16/2014 at 1:09am - misc - by bad birthdays - United States (California)

Today, I excitedly told my family that, after years of studying and dedication, I've been awarded a full scholarship to Germany. My mom's reaction was to start sobbing about me becoming a "heathen" and my dad and brother started telling Nazi jokes. FML

#21237389
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39587) - you deserved it (3258)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:28am - misc - by UnSupported (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

#21237384
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36511) - you deserved it (4539)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:06am - animals - by hopeless romantic - United States (Ohio)



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