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Ultimawolf25

Offline (the 08/23/2014 at 9:18am) | Search for a member

Ultimawolf25

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 March 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 367
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Ultimawolf25's page activity

Visits<b>TheEmoSuperman</b> - 8 hours ago<b>mahovalia</b> - yesterday at 2:32pm<b>jkmartinjk</b> - yesterday at 1:41pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:49pm<b>peacefulterroist</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 6:53am<b>thxnder</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 2:26am<b>ninety</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 11:51pm<b>ebsblackwood</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:52am<b>Candicane241</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:59am<b>MartinDJ</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 2:51am<b>Captain_Becca_Ge</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:20pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 12:56am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 7:19pm<b>deactive12</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:51am<b>talesoftheold</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 2:24pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 10:21pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 10:16pm<b>PhdFloppyTits</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 5:57pm

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Ultimawolf25's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend found on Tinder the profile of a guy I've been dating and getting quite serious with. I was surprised, not only because he'd told me he didn't do "stuff" like Facebook or Tinder, but because he lied about his job and his surname. Oh, and the fact that he got married in March. FML

#21202569
173 comments

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57112) - you deserved it (7970)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML

#21174767
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39449) - you deserved it (3847)

On 06/14/2014 at 8:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I ran into my girlfriend by chance while out shopping. She looked different than usual. Maybe it was the wedding ring she was wearing, or how she had her arm around another gentleman, gee, I don't know. That's two years of my life wasted. FML

#21168433
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63044) - you deserved it (5135)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:03pm - love - by wrecked (man) - United States

Today, my grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer. We're very close, and I called my boyfriend, really needing some support. I'd barely told him what had happened, when he replied, "Babe, I'm in the middle of a game here. Call me later." FML

#21150333
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48139) - you deserved it (6078)

On 05/24/2014 at 3:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML

#20932505
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55309) - you deserved it (3690)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44307) - you deserved it (2987)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boyfriend got offered a job at Abercrombie. The first thing he asked was "they only hire hot people, right?!" Now he won't stop telling me how lucky I am to be with such a hot guy. FML

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

#20846451
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52978) - you deserved it (5948)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML

#20840638
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35994) - you deserved it (5505)

On 08/16/2013 at 5:33pm - misc - by that's methed up, darling (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47947) - you deserved it (23064)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, a customer pulled a knife on me after I informed him that we'd run out of avocados to put on his pizza. FML

#20815101
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46552) - you deserved it (3362)

On 08/01/2013 at 11:18am - work - by are these people even HUMAN? (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my 18-year-old daughter texted me and told me that she got in a car crash. She texted, "I forgot wich way wus left lol" and then quickly added "yolo right? Lol". FML

#20814697
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58297) - you deserved it (10384)

On 08/01/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by father of the year - United States



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