UltimateGIRness

Search for a member

UltimateGIRness

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2506
  • Number of comments : 156
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About UltimateGIRness : I am a true southern sweetheart. I don't wear makeup or obsess over guys like most girls my age (13) I show goats for the Chattooga county FFA and I have never seen a stranger. I literally will talk to anyone about anythang( i even spent 40 minutes talking to a wrong number) Don't message cause I use the app. Bye now. Oh and side note: now that you have read this,we are best friends,you have no choice.

UltimateGIRness's page activity

Visits<b>farmboy2750</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:56pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 12:58am<b>Shadow9876</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 1:23pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 6:06pm<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 5:46pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 6:11pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 2:01am<b>epicx22</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 5:58pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 8:33pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 11:29pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>mayacat</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 4:18pm<b>willt9797</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:39pm<b>DeathofCareBear</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:19pm<b>laxnatishah</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 8:47am<b>teejaycro</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 4:23pm<b>cmonger</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:23am<b>NotAUser</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 5:16pm

Fucked!<b>Shadow9876</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 7:24pm

UltimateGIRness's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of UltimateGIRness's badges

UltimateGIRness's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend joked to my co-workers that my kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me for spending $200 on shoes. Later on, my rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split my lip. Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow. FML

by iLuvsIt / 11/06/2012 at 4:32am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML

by fnfantastic / 11/04/2012 at 11:37am / United States (Indiana) / Money

Today, I decided to delete my Facebook account. My older sister repeatedly called me in tears asking why I'm cutting her out of my life. It seems I can't get rid of social media without my family taking offence. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2012 at 6:02am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

by for fuck sake dad / 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm / Ireland (Limerick) / Love

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2012 at 7:48am / France (Picardie) / Love

Today, my family and I are sitting in our house while Hurricane Sandy is going on. My grandma is freaking out because she believes it's our recently deceased dog Sandy getting revenge for putting her to sleep and getting a new dog. FML

by With_Love929 / 10/29/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I were preparing for the arrival of Hurricane Sandy. I tasked him with going out to buy emergency groceries in case we lose power. He returned with dozens of microwave cup noodles. We're going to starve. FML

by cupnoodles / 10/28/2012 at 4:14pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm / United States / Kids

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to tell my 10-year-old son that if he wanted to get girls, he had to do the Gangnam Style. My son has now non-stop been doing the Gangnam Style. FML

by friedbutter / 10/28/2012 at 10:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

by left4dead / 10/27/2012 at 4:04pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I had left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

by nicedoggy / 10/23/2012 at 2:05pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing with my 2-year-old Siberian Husky, when she figured that since she couldn't get to my hand, she'd try to bite me in the genitals. She was successful. FML

by buccaneer / 10/23/2012 at 12:26pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML

by afraidofcans / 10/23/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

by Annonymous / 10/18/2012 at 10:41am / United States / Animals

Today, I discovered my son, who has recently moved out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wanted the new Pokemon game, and "compromises had to be made". FML

by anon / 10/18/2012 at 4:33am / Australia / Kids