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TwoXMike

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TwoXMike

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 October 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 874
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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TwoXMike's page activity

Visits<b>ZachHatesPeople</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 9:39am<b>JokerPajamas</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:35am<b>Jillian369</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 6:35am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:53am<b>jillylamb</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 4:35pm<b>xwingtwo</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:07pm<b>NomadicPie</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:45pm<b>jleon3</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:25am<b>LilTiki559</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 5:36am<b>UsEumYong</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 10:38pm<b>akma9</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 8:51pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 4:34am<b>tralala453</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 10:20am<b>dallaschloe2</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 9:42pm<b>yupitssoph</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 4:51am<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 9:38am<b>LostInTransation</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 8:00am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 5:27am

TwoXMike's FML badges

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TwoXMike's favorite FMLs

Today, the creepy kid on the bus saved me a seat again. Thinking he wanted to be friends, I followed him on twitter. He was doing a live video feed so I checked it out. It was of me. FML

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML

#20895757
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38949) - you deserved it (4983)

On 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm - misc - by scared shitless in ohio (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the nice guy who comes to my workplace every morning to bring me a smoothie also makes a point of putting his knob in it before giving it to me. Also, all my coworkers knew about this and think it's hilarious. FML

#20895155
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44118) - you deserved it (4153)

On 09/24/2013 at 11:51pm - work - by littledipper - United States (New York)

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

#20894419
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52906) - you deserved it (5069)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Craigslist is Evil. - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to visit my overly-posh mother for the first time in many years. Upon arrival, she kicked me out because my outfit did not follow the same color-scheme as her decor. FML

#20888617
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43942) - you deserved it (2996)

On 09/20/2013 at 1:52am - misc - by wat - United States (California)

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51203) - you deserved it (4978)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my colleagues and I found out that our boss has been taking business advice from an astrologer as well as a soothsayer. FML

#20886196
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32230) - you deserved it (2418)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:34am - work - by CrystalsDontWork - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55158) - you deserved it (27677)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55158) - you deserved it (27677)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, I realized that what I thought for years was my country's National Anthem, is actually the theme song of a TV show. FML

#20878595
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18612) - you deserved it (53553)

On 09/12/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by :| (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49631) - you deserved it (3961)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML

#20874059
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42868) - you deserved it (5439)

On 09/09/2013 at 2:42am - misc - by jessel_ladd92 (man) - United States

Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML

#20868804
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46230) - you deserved it (4411)

On 09/05/2013 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by fuck my liBLARGHSLJNAdlajdSzxz (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

#20868509
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39860) - you deserved it (2963)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by down trodden (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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