Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

Twisted_Angel

Search for a member

Twisted_Angel
  • Town/Country : So Cali, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2643
  • Number of comments : 214
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Twisted_Angel : Welcome to my world... lucky you >:)

Twisted_Angel's last visitors

pantherfan0877Catkam623FallenShadowsDetroitDovSillyGirl4602CollingtonkyleekaySmariomModernXSuperman

Twisted_Angel's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Twisted_Angel's badges

Twisted_Angel's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

#17531478
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20929) - you deserved it (1479)

On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States

Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML

#17526704
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52055) - you deserved it (2574)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:26am - love - by AlwaysGottaFML - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32061) - you deserved it (2235)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11713) - you deserved it (36439)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

#17488478
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5434) - you deserved it (48239)

On 08/16/2011 at 6:17am - animals - by NaniNarcotic - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8093) - you deserved it (58157)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and best friend. They are now having blood-curdling sex in our tent. My friend is also my ride home. FML

#16746059
500 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46937) - you deserved it (5176)

On 06/19/2011 at 2:08pm - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

#16477855
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26028) - you deserved it (3534)

On 06/03/2011 at 12:47am - work - by whymyliferose - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML

#15947256
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23569) - you deserved it (13026)

On 04/27/2011 at 10:05am - animals - by scarred4life (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

#15791793
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24578) - you deserved it (5739)

On 04/15/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by HWS - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

#15714709
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18512) - you deserved it (31531)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29029) - you deserved it (8487)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)

Today, I have a cat with separation anxiety. By this, I mean whenever I go in another room and shut the door with her outside, she uses her head as a battering ram to try and break down the door. It's fun trying to sleep too. FML

#15366508
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (4526)

On 03/18/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by nosleeptilpissoff (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88709) - you deserved it (4720) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88709) - you deserved it (4720) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML’s Roommates from hell
  • If we could, we’d probably all live on our own. Exotic dancers would do our cleaning and housework; bartenders would serve us glamorous cocktails with mini paper umbrellas in them every hour on the dot. We would…

Monday 20 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: