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Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20929) - you deserved it (1479)
On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States
Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52055) - you deserved it (2574)
On 08/20/2011 at 3:26am - love - by AlwaysGottaFML - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32061) - you deserved it (2235)
On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)
Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11713) - you deserved it (36439)
On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5434) - you deserved it (48239)
On 08/16/2011 at 6:17am - animals - by NaniNarcotic - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8093) - you deserved it (58157)
On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and best friend. They are now having blood-curdling sex in our tent. My friend is also my ride home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46937) - you deserved it (5176)
On 06/19/2011 at 2:08pm - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26028) - you deserved it (3534)
On 06/03/2011 at 12:47am - work - by whymyliferose - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23569) - you deserved it (13026)
On 04/27/2011 at 10:05am - animals - by scarred4life (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24578) - you deserved it (5739)
On 04/15/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by HWS - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18512) - you deserved it (31531)
On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29029) - you deserved it (8487)
On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)
Today, I have a cat with separation anxiety. By this, I mean whenever I go in another room and shut the door with her outside, she uses her head as a battering ram to try and break down the door. It's fun trying to sleep too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (4526)
On 03/18/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by nosleeptilpissoff (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (88709) - you deserved it (4720) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (88709) - you deserved it (4720) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Monday 20 May 2013
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