About Twisted_Angel : Welcome to my world... lucky you >:)
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Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26769) - you deserved it (2339)
On 09/14/2011 at 4:34am - intimacy - by jumpedjogger - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend gave me a gift. A half-used bottle of body lotion that belonged to his dead wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25508) - you deserved it (2093)
On 09/14/2011 at 12:12am - love - by ppp - United States
Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17742) - you deserved it (6815)
On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30765) - you deserved it (3320)
On 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm - kids - by Randy - United States (Alabama)
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13778) - you deserved it (163148)
On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23336) - you deserved it (8949)
On 09/07/2011 at 1:37pm - work - by seriously? - United States
Today, I put my cat in the tub for a bath, as he rolled around in some mud. The second I put my hand on the faucet to turn the water on, he screamed, rather loudly. I yelled in shock, which must have scared him further, as he vigorously attacked my face and pissed on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16245) - you deserved it (10041)
On 09/07/2011 at 12:47pm - animals - by GEFStryker - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my husband compared me to his parent's dog. Why? Because when I sleep I fart and scare myself awake... Just like his parents dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19748) - you deserved it (6999)
On 09/05/2011 at 3:19pm - animals - by anonomys (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I bought a new goldfish. While leaving my fish on my balcony to go get fish food, I hear a loud squawk and splash, I race outside to see a bird flying off with my fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10976) - you deserved it (27079)
On 08/28/2011 at 7:29am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23130) - you deserved it (1824)
On 08/27/2011 at 6:59pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25345) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22356) - you deserved it (4149)
On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States
Today, over a year on from my parents telling me my dog had died, I went to the shelter to volunteer, and saw my old dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38158) - you deserved it (1526)
On 08/21/2011 at 1:51am - animals - by Dogless - United States (Pennsylvania)
Friday 24 May 2013
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