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Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10651) - you deserved it (16420)
On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)
Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10651) - you deserved it (16420)
On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)
Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26376) - you deserved it (2967)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22443) - you deserved it (2371)
On 01/11/2012 at 12:23am - misc - by RatFailure (woman) - United States
Today, my manager came into the dog grooming salon I work at, lecturing about the importance of staying out of a dog's "bite zone". Right then, the dog I was working on bit me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15164) - you deserved it (2684)
On 01/10/2012 at 7:50am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend changed his relationship status on Facebook to "Single" and his status to "I'm not kidding, leave your key on the counter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (2593)
On 01/10/2012 at 12:52am - love - by Janie (woman) - United States
Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24253) - you deserved it (1951)
On 01/06/2012 at 2:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24253) - you deserved it (1951)
On 01/06/2012 at 2:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25757) - you deserved it (2278)
On 01/04/2012 at 6:29pm - misc - by jada - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27086) - you deserved it (4425)
On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35546) - you deserved it (5428)
On 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my favorite fish died. To make things better my parents thought to take me out to dinner. We ate sushi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20715) - you deserved it (4513)
On 12/31/2011 at 3:44am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was woken up early in the morning by the sound of my mother frantically crying out for help. Apparently she had tried, unsuccessfully, to "end the suffering" of an injured squirrel by drowning it in the toilet. How? By placing it into the bowl and smothering it with clothes. My clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22318) - you deserved it (1624)
On 12/21/2011 at 1:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I texted a friend offering my condolences over the death of his grandfather. He hadn't been told his grandfather had died yet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24723) - you deserved it (3356)
On 12/21/2011 at 9:40am - misc - by cmolloy - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16533) - you deserved it (4153)
On 12/20/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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