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Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16138) - you deserved it (1616)
On 03/30/2012 at 3:45am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18715) - you deserved it (2502)
On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)
Today, I kicked my dog's toy snake out of my way. Then I realised my dog doesn't have a toy snake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22523) - you deserved it (2163)
On 03/25/2012 at 1:49am - animals - by uh-oh - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10645) - you deserved it (23842)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22574) - you deserved it (12998)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13548) - you deserved it (7363)
On 03/12/2012 at 5:45pm - misc - by anonamous - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21457) - you deserved it (4323)
On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States
Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6823) - you deserved it (101287)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a date with a woman. She brought her dog along. Every time when I touched her, the jealous male dog began to bark and tried to bite me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19126) - you deserved it (2489)
On 03/10/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by Jimii Liu (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30503) - you deserved it (4750)
On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8799) - you deserved it (12402)
On 03/08/2012 at 12:47am - work - by Honey Badger (woman) - United States
Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22986) - you deserved it (1351)
On 03/07/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Hungrytoothbrush (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31872) - you deserved it (2046)
On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31872) - you deserved it (2046)
On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I thought I was home alone, so I started singing to my cat. After a half hour of this, I finally stopped. Then I heard applauding. I turned around to find my parents standing in my doorway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9325) - you deserved it (15128)
On 03/06/2012 at 2:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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