Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Twisted107

Search for a member

Twisted107

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1103
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Twisted107's page activity

Visits<b>JVVortex</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:40pm<b>contour69</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:40am<b>ilovebadluck</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 12:16am<b>boomboom838</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 8:42pm<b>kumarina</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 12:44am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 4:24pm<b>iIixoxiIi</b> - the 01/30/2011 at 2:50am<b>chellygreen</b> - the 12/10/2010 at 2:17am<b>Random_guy12</b> - the 11/19/2010 at 2:23am

Twisted107's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Twisted107's badges

Twisted107's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32774) - you deserved it (20208)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went out for some very expensive sushi. Two hours later, I found myself on the toilet, violently voiding my bowels. I essentially paid to have liquid orange shit. FML

#15294170
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26267) - you deserved it (6837)

On 03/13/2011 at 2:55pm - health - by sushi hater - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother keyed my car because I wouldn't invite her into my home and get her a cup of tea, so she could continue screaming that she was going to kill me while I tried to feed my 4 month old daughter. The last time I got her a cup of tea she threw it in my face. FML

Today, my sister and I got into an argument at a tennis court which ended up with her trying to run me over in the parking lot. I stepped to the side and hit her door, denting it. My parents expect me to pay for the damage caused by my sister trying to kill me. FML

#13357466
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27826) - you deserved it (3060)

On 10/07/2010 at 7:37pm - misc - by toyotasmash - United States

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34248) - you deserved it (22713)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

#8743976
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34969) - you deserved it (2329)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML

#8642847
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36619) - you deserved it (3111)

On 02/25/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by Ringless - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex girlfriend that never moved out. FML

#8631765
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28233) - you deserved it (2401)

On 02/25/2010 at 1:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was riding the bus. Suddenly, it appeared to start to snow inside the bus, and I assumed a window was open. When I looked up however, I discovered the girl in front of me putting her hair up in a ponytail. The so-called "snow" was coming off of her head. FML

#8176848
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26195) - you deserved it (1795)

On 02/12/2010 at 7:04pm - misc - by ummmmEW - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went back to school after missing the first 2 weeks of the new school year. I got grilled in my first lesson by my teacher for "gallivanting around on holiday in some sunny place" when I should've been at school learning. My dad had died from liver cancer. FML

#7470356
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54750) - you deserved it (2471)

On 01/21/2010 at 6:41am - health - by Dude (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML

#7448210
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36655) - you deserved it (13003)

On 01/19/2010 at 10:59pm - misc - by NYCguy (man) - United States (New York)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
183 comments

Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML

#7215962
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (3931)

On 01/08/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32941) - you deserved it (2791)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: