Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Turn

Offline (5 hours ago) | Search for a member

Turn

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3187
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Turn's page activity

Visits<b>FitFriday</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 12:17pm<b>thenick_m</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 10:16pm<b>godlife704</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 1:13pm<b>CCzero</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 4:54am<b>isuckwithnames</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 9:13pm

Fucked!<b>FitFriday</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 6:17pm

Turn's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Turn's badges

Turn's favorite FMLs

Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML

#15149183
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31107) - you deserved it (8827)

On 02/28/2011 at 5:55am - love - by notagoodsign (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML

#15144995
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20465) - you deserved it (47477)

On 02/27/2011 at 10:23pm - money - by Anonymous -

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

#15052365
412 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7350) - you deserved it (97629)

On 02/20/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by :/ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I met my daughter's boyfriend, who she hopes to marry. I asked what he does, to which he answered, "I'm a Flamencologist." Flamencology? The study of Flamenco? Huh? FML

#14838369
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22977) - you deserved it (6393)

On 02/04/2011 at 10:01am - kids - by dancer101 (woman) - United States

Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML

#14797258
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8401) - you deserved it (62382)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Brea - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

#14497989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13351) - you deserved it (19882)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:22pm - misc - by RabbitOwner - United States

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

#14058038
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65777) - you deserved it (5193)

On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -

Today, was my first day at school. I got kicked out of the class for imitating a monkey. I wasn't imitating a monkey... I was laughing. FML

#13865567
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34500) - you deserved it (4771)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, I thought my house was being broken into in the dead of night. Frightened, I dismounted a floor lamp as a make-shift weapon and crept through the house, channelling my inner Ellen Ripley. It turned out to be the wireless printer with a paper jam. FML

#13847901
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19387) - you deserved it (6295)

On 11/15/2010 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML

#13816723
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24038) - you deserved it (4614)

On 11/12/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my six year old daughter discovered the family's pet rabbit in the basement freezer. The rabbit had died almost a year ago, and we'd stored it in the freezer, intending to bury it later. Here's to the trauma of losing the family pet. Twice. FML

#13815438
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7230) - you deserved it (40228)

On 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

#13787466
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48833) - you deserved it (17799)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met my boyfriend's whole family. Between them they had about 10 teeth. FML

#13770099
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33707) - you deserved it (4708)

On 11/08/2010 at 9:25pm - love - by unknown - United States (Florida)

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

#13762266
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31432) - you deserved it (5312)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: