About Tristyxxx : Married January 2nd 2013 !!!!!
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Today, I was at work using a wood finishing product that we apply by hand. After 2 straight days of using it I finally read the label. It said "This product contains a chemical known to the state of California to cause cancer". Good thing nobody told me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13453) - you deserved it (7678)
On 03/03/2010 at 5:49am - work - by painter - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, the bartender pulled me aside and told me that she saw my date slip something into my drink. Who was my date? My husband of four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (1695)
On 03/03/2010 at 12:37am - misc - by holycrap (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished I jokingly said, "who's going to sleep in the wet patch?". He got up and said "you're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing". It was my first time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23010) - you deserved it (2725)
On 02/15/2010 at 8:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. The reason? She slept with four men while I was two weeks away visiting my brother. She told me it was because she missed me so much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16849) - you deserved it (1530)
On 02/14/2010 at 10:19am - intimacy - by CheatedOn (man) - Romania (Cluj)
Today, I found out why my five year old has been throwing tantrums while shopping. It turns out my ex-husband has been paying her three dollars for every public tantrum she throws. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27310) - you deserved it (2411)
On 02/09/2010 at 12:53pm - kids - by inthedark (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went to the store with my 4 1/2 year old daughter. When we got to the cosmetics aisle, she asked what make-up was for, I told her it was to make women prettier. My daughter then told me it was a good thing I wear make-up because I was ugly and that I might scare off my husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22399) - you deserved it (2885)
On 02/04/2010 at 10:53pm - kids - by 102496 - Sent from mobile version
Today, in the middle of having sex, my boyfriend of two years got a call. After taking the call, he said, "It's an emergency," and that he has to go. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me is wife is going into labour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18701) - you deserved it (3823)
On 12/20/2009 at 2:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (3599)
On 11/29/2009 at 2:13am - kids - by Granmacathy (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend woke up very early in terrible pain. I drove her to the hospital and fell asleep in the waiting area. When I woke up, my car was gone and it was 9am. She had assumed I just walked home (32 miles), so she took the car. I was the only one in the waiting area. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24673) - you deserved it (1931)
On 11/19/2009 at 10:53am - health - by nolips (man) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him "Where did you go to the potty?". He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24049) - you deserved it (2656)
On 11/16/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Japan (Okinawa)
Today, I told my wife to block the mail of her ex (because he was sending her romantic mails) or I would leave. She told me that I could leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25738) - you deserved it (4087)
On 11/13/2009 at 11:23pm - love - by RedLust (man) - Bolivia (Cochabamba)
Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed to grab a diaper. I turned around to see that she'd peed on my comforter. I then put her in her playpen to put my cover in the wash. I came back into the room to get her, and saw she'd taken off her diaper. She'd crapped in her playpen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21986) - you deserved it (6081)
On 11/04/2009 at 8:23pm - kids - by raebay (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I was hanging out with my friends. My friend started talking about how unfair it is that women can use their breasts to get promotions. I told him that he has no place to talk, as he used his "d*ck" a few months ago with his female boss. His girlfriend of 3 years was sitting next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5367) - you deserved it (18822)
On 11/02/2009 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by konichiwa (man) - United States (California)
Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9014) - you deserved it (31772)
On 09/25/2009 at 11:24am - misc - by Needasafe1234 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25555) - you deserved it (6838)
On 09/22/2009 at 9:10pm - love - by cchandler (woman) - United States (Washington)
Friday 24 May 2013
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