Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Tpracingkg

Offline (the 11/07/2014 at 8:34am) | Search for a member

Tpracingkg

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5080
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tpracingkg : Diabetes is hell

Tpracingkg's page activity

Visits<b>guitarman789</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 6:51pm<b>thatguy7878</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:31am<b>catchmenow1</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:19pm<b>Bobby100</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:05pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:25pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:31am<b>littleteapot</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:20am<b>Jreslier</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:50am<b>freezingmylife</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:45am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:33pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 4:42pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 10:05pm<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:19am<b>FML_Elle</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Victormoon</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 6:22am<b>ghostytocute1000</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 2:31am<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:13pm

Tpracingkg's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Tpracingkg's badges

Tpracingkg's favorite FMLs

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

#1837844
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93225) - you deserved it (5101)

On 05/11/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by mistake (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (429104) - you deserved it (59824)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up happier than I've ever been because last night I hooked up with the girl I have loved for almost a year and I thought I would never get with her. This morning I saw that her status on Facebook was "FML". FML

#1782670
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75359) - you deserved it (6507)

On 05/09/2009 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up happier than I've ever been because last night I hooked up with the girl I have loved for almost a year and I thought I would never get with her. This morning I saw that her status on Facebook was "FML". FML

#1782670
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75359) - you deserved it (6507)

On 05/09/2009 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had surgery on my foot. The doctor told me I'd be on crutches for 6 months. I texted my boyfriend the news, promising lots of intimate favors if he'd watch movies with me while on bed rest for the next week. He texted back, "No way. I don't date cripples." Dumped for a broken foot. FML

#1743823
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60335) - you deserved it (4692)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:28am - health - by gimp. (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's sorority formal, we were both drunk. We went into the bathroom, she started to give me head. After about 30 seconds the song changes and she jumps up and goes out to dance, leaving me there. Door open. Penis out. It was the song she requested. FML

#1592425
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69456) - you deserved it (18208)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:10pm - intimacy - by Lootz (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML

#1409707
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105935) - you deserved it (8233)

On 04/27/2009 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by seriouslywtf (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he gets a call from his best friend whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzips his pants and mouths, "She won't know." FML

#1404603
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65168) - you deserved it (6816)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend of two years, who is a fabulous guitarist and singer, told me he wrote me a song. I was so excited. Turns out it was a break up song. FML

#1399527
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58870) - you deserved it (3711)

On 04/27/2009 at 5:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

#1387325
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24097) - you deserved it (121220)

On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking away doing my thing. When I looked back, my boyfriend had headphones on and was playing air drums. FML

Today, when I was walking in to the grocery store, a van pulls up and a bunch of guys get out who look really drunk. I jokingly said to the sober-looking man who had driven the van "Sucks you have to be the designated driver!" Turns out the "Drunk" guys were actually mentally challenged. FML

#1178108
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13872) - you deserved it (61949)

On 04/20/2009 at 11:14pm - misc - by dummy441 - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: