Tpracingkg

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Offline (the 11/07/2014 at 8:34am)

Tpracingkg

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 April 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13134
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tpracingkg : Diabetes is hell

Tpracingkg's page activity

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Tpracingkg's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Tpracingkg's favorite FMLs

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML

by Gurior / 09/04/2011 at 3:01am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

by Username / 08/31/2011 at 3:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

by RohnAbheek / 08/21/2011 at 1:36pm / India (Maharashtra) / Intimacy

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

by Username / 08/21/2011 at 5:59am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

by ifailsobadly / 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend showed me his penis for the first time. All I could think to say was, "That's a clean circumcision." FML

by plantfood / 08/06/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, our power went out due to some severe storms. My daughter, who is 18, asked me why the lights on the car still worked. FML

by OhDeary / 08/01/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

by FML / 07/29/2011 at 12:20am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

by kringr / 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2011 at 7:21am / Intimacy

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

by anon80214 / 05/30/2011 at 3:15pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2011 at 10:04am / United States / Intimacy