Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Tpracingkg

Offline (the 11/07/2014 at 8:34am) | Search for a member

Tpracingkg

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 April 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9664
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tpracingkg : Diabetes is hell

Tpracingkg's page activity

Visits<b>connectthedots</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 6:10pm<b>Karennnx</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 4:20am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 11:42am<b>guitarman789</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 6:51pm<b>thatguy7878</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:31am<b>catchmenow1</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:19pm<b>Bobby100</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:05pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:25pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:31am<b>littleteapot</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:20am<b>Jreslier</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:50am<b>freezingmylife</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:45am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:33pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 4:42pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 10:05pm<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:19am<b>FML_Elle</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 11:05pm

Tpracingkg's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Tpracingkg's badges

Tpracingkg's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51965) - you deserved it (11228)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML

#20815680
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42315) - you deserved it (8586)

On 08/01/2013 at 6:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't said "It's not the size of the stick, it's how you use it." I'm a girl. FML

#20814602
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55066) - you deserved it (4550)

On 08/01/2013 at 1:10am - intimacy - by confused_girl (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML

#20813792
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46681) - you deserved it (7646)

On 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by -_____- (woman) - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

#20812711
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46153) - you deserved it (4903)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Bnewlove - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I finally gave away all of the stuffed animals that I've been hoarding for years. Proud, I told my family. They congratulated me by buying me stuffed animals. FML

#20812476
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44116) - you deserved it (4485)

On 07/30/2013 at 11:06pm - misc - by TheSacredTeddyBear (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML

#20812086
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49310) - you deserved it (5484)

On 07/30/2013 at 7:19pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

#20811460
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40104) - you deserved it (13215)

On 07/30/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by kiwichick4life (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58762) - you deserved it (9134)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

#20809554
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62638) - you deserved it (5430)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by PrettyScared (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

#20809292
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64372) - you deserved it (9511)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

#20808604
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62370) - you deserved it (9237)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47702) - you deserved it (6966)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

#20806809
117 comments

Today, I received some unwanted anal sex tips. They were unwanted because I'm not into anal sex, and the tips came from my drunk mom. FML

#20806687
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52739) - you deserved it (4119)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by moms know best??? (man) - Canada (Alberta)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: