Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Torify

Search for a member

Torify

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8823
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Torify's page activity

Visits<b>DoctaD23</b> - yesterday at 1:49pm<b>Luraxoxo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 5:00pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 6:10pm<b>Killjoy4821</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:09pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 6:34pm<b>blackmamba89</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 10:59pm<b>brooke_chook</b> - the 04/09/2010 at 5:36am<b>Freeze</b> - the 03/15/2010 at 11:12pm<b>mauhavok</b> - the 12/20/2009 at 5:22pm<b>jelsew</b> - the 11/02/2009 at 8:16pm<b>Damone</b> - the 09/25/2009 at 7:11pm<b>Ihavetopee</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 8:43pm<b>xbox_playa</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 3:10pm<b>thisismyaccount</b> - the 08/09/2009 at 11:22pm<b>Zenma</b> - the 08/01/2009 at 4:41am<b>juboy24</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 3:55am<b>altkat</b> - the 07/20/2009 at 3:19am

Torify's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Torify's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (348184) - you deserved it (38596)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

#794025
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71010) - you deserved it (18391)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (243278) - you deserved it (32113)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned I made the dean's honor list for my college for the first time since attending. I asked my dad if he was proud of me, to which he replied, "when you're as successful as your brother, I'll be proud." My brother is a Chippendale's dancer. FML

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (231916) - you deserved it (81175)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: