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Thumper_Stumper

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Thumper_Stumper
  • Town/Country : Kingston, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 June 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 223
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Thumper_Stumper's favorite FMLs

Today, while spray painting a rocking horse for my kids I left the can outside in the sun. When I picked it up it was hot to the touch and I dropped it. It exploded on impact and now I am more blue than the rocking horse. FML

#4083142 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (30624) - you deserved it (14544)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:08pm - animals - by usafprog (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

#4081805 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (52693) - you deserved it (2186)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

#4079125 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (13485) - you deserved it (36651)

On 07/27/2009 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

#4053619 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (16927) - you deserved it (40242)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my nose was really stuffed up and I was out of cold medicine. I heard spices may help with this kind of problem. Unfortunately I thought red pepper would be a great thing to snort at the time. Not only is my nose still stuffed up but I also have immense nasal pain. FML

#4046388 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (4528) - you deserved it (57231)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

#4046377 (763)

I agree, your life sucks (85067) - you deserved it (25502)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (64284) - you deserved it (4464)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

#2799622 (1288)

I agree, your life sucks (32858) - you deserved it (488511)

On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142 (288)

I agree, your life sucks (70745) - you deserved it (14823)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)



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