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ThriceWritten

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ThriceWritten
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 456
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About ThriceWritten : I'm a writer and a college student. Just here for fun. Nothing special.

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ThriceWritten's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28100) - you deserved it (4424)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend because he is tired of everyone giving him shit about my ginger hair. FML

#17517733
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35881) - you deserved it (5887)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:38am - love - by ginger (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30015) - you deserved it (8708)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

#17373472
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38457) - you deserved it (3089)

On 08/05/2011 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Creeped_out_n_stuck (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35432) - you deserved it (5398)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66619) - you deserved it (6939)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML

#17030601
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7658) - you deserved it (60983)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:38pm - misc - by UhOh (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35149) - you deserved it (2786)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

#16577397
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30982) - you deserved it (6079)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Patrick R - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "you know you can't wash and reuse these." FML

#15846641
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22725) - you deserved it (19069)

On 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm - misc - by killercow - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I called the car repair shop to complain to the manager about their tow driver who keeps making sexual passes at me. The girl taking my call started crying and said that their driver was her husband. I'm being sexually harassed, my car is dead, and I think I just ended a marriage. FML

#15399949
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42637) - you deserved it (3596)

On 03/20/2011 at 1:42pm - misc - by WhyMe (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got a call from my long distance girlfriend. She's about a month pregnant. I haven't seen her in person for six months, but she still insists it's mine. I don't know which would be worse: her lying or her being that stupid. FML

#15321178
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52657) - you deserved it (5064)

On 03/15/2011 at 11:50am - love - by notthedad (man) - China

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49294) - you deserved it (4171) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35977) - you deserved it (22602)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

#15078337
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39106) - you deserved it (8273)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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