About ThriceWritten : I'm a writer and a college student. Just here for fun. Nothing special.
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ThriceWritten's favorite FMLs
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
by OUCH. / 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 11/14/2011 at 12:23am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/03/2011 at 3:29am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML
by DrakeScott / 11/02/2011 at 2:14pm / United States (Maine) / Love
by sarah / 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2011 at 2:58am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML
by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML
by f_ck_U / 09/21/2011 at 2:47am / China (Zhejiang) / Work
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
Today, I joined my school's film-making club so I could get an opportunity to act in the club president's screenplays. It turns out her idea of a tragedy is a creepy, sci-fi version of Romeo and Juliet, with elves, starring her as the perfect Mary Sue style lead character. I can't get out of this. FML
by Actor / 09/02/2011 at 9:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Texas) / Work
by ginger / 08/19/2011 at 6:38am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love
- Today, after months of planning & asking her father permission, I proposed to my girlfriend of five… Today, I came back from a 2 week vacation to find out my dad and stepmother divorced. She took the… Today, while changing my 10 week old baby's nappy and everything was going fine as usual. Just as I…