Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Thenextguyover

Search for a member

Thenextguyover

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 January 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1410
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Thenextguyover : 18. Metalhead. Gamer.

Thenextguyover's page activity

Visits<b>akrolaser</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 5:51pm<b>ksadhera</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 11:39pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 5:04pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 8:01am<b>lifa</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 7:27am<b>umerin</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:44am<b>Ryiah</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Turn</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 3:08pm<b>KailaWayla</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 8:44pm<b>kate_themediocre</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:55pm<b>kendoge</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:11am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:08pm<b>Stygiant</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:19pm<b>benjithebigboi</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:02pm<b>_spacekid</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:36pm<b>pinkchocoa</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:45pm<b>maxface</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:49pm<b>JocelynKaulitz</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 10:13pm

Liked!<b>_spacekid</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:36pm

Thenextguyover's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Thenextguyover's badges

Thenextguyover's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

#20669389
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49669) - you deserved it (13510)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50934) - you deserved it (8859)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

#20644913
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45545) - you deserved it (6103)

On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I learned my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I don't know if I'm more annoyed that he casually mentioned it after we've been together for 10 years, or that it actually works. FML

#20636797
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45218) - you deserved it (13405)

On 05/02/2013 at 11:59am - intimacy - by MommaAnnie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

#20634924
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27420) - you deserved it (53491)

On 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML

#20634724
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61694) - you deserved it (4982)

On 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML

#20629579
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24166) - you deserved it (57719)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:26am - love - by bad day Brutus (man) - United States

Today, nobody wants to hang out with me due to a nasty rumor that my ex has spread. No one will tell me what was said, because I apparently "know full well" what I did. FML

#20624422
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49781) - you deserved it (3571)

On 04/27/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by dabull (man) - United States

Today, I had a formal complaint filed against me for being outrageously rude to a customer. All I did was tell a customer that she couldn't use food stamps at the movie theater. FML

#20620985
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44354) - you deserved it (2514)

On 04/25/2013 at 3:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML

#20620111
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62972) - you deserved it (13161)

On 04/25/2013 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Live Sweet -

Today, I answered a call at work from a very irate gentleman. After being shouted and sworn at profusely, I ended the call in a slightly less than civil manner. Turns out that guy is one of our company's biggest clients. FML

#20615900
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28055) - you deserved it (39994)

On 04/23/2013 at 2:25pm - work - by hatemyjob (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (111812)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex with him. Apparently the fact that I gave birth to our twins 10 days ago isn't a good enough reason to turn him down. FML

#20609608
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76304) - you deserved it (6962)

On 04/21/2013 at 6:20am - intimacy - by loving wife - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49257) - you deserved it (6438)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: