Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Thenextguyover

Search for a member

Thenextguyover

18Fucked!

Thenextguyover
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 January 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2355
  • Number of comments : 171
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Thenextguyover : I play guitar and I'm a twin. I'm accident prone and have many stories that go along with it.

Thenextguyover's page activity

Visits<b>ajean97</b> - 19 hours ago<b>qdawg06</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 1:18am<b>paige_xud</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 7:55pm<b>lola4455</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:46pm<b>sarcasmwins</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:16pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:41pm<b>kathrynbudders</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 5:32pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:56am<b>ccmaniac</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 12:58pm<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:43am<b>Shipley18</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:57pm<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 11:34am<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 6:27pm<b>DejaRenee</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 5:50pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 5:44pm<b>sappy23</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 10:39am<b>irainbowl</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:20am<b>gis0392</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 3:41am

Fucked!<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 5:35pm<b>LaceyRenea753</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 7:18am<b>sunnyskys</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 6:42pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:16pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:47am<b>BellaRoseeee</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:14am<b>sarahyep</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:00am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 7:50am<b>lucyisbae</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:42am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 1:24am<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 4:13pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 5:29am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 3:03am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 9:45am<b>BBlah</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 5:02pm<b>w0o0a</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 7:15am<b>_spacekid</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:36pm

Thenextguyover's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Thenextguyover's badges

Thenextguyover's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45443) - you deserved it (3339)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44407) - you deserved it (4024)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I let out a monstrous fart at the gym. They said it didn't even sound human. FML

#21341250
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28245) - you deserved it (6440)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:41pm - misc - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, I had lunch with my parents. I'm an Asian guy who married a Puerto Rican woman and we just had a boy. My dad looks at my son, then looks at me and says, "You ruined the bloodline." FML

Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML

#21302766
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32684) - you deserved it (7556)

On 11/20/2014 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by fuck fof and die dad (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37316) - you deserved it (11300)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48296) - you deserved it (3554)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38572) - you deserved it (3383)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41103) - you deserved it (9530)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38497) - you deserved it (14872)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52010) - you deserved it (21254)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, despite all of the empty seats on the bus, a man sat next to me. So close to me that our legs touched. After a few moments of silence, he got closer and whispered in my ear, "You're so quiet." FML

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, my parents made a game out of deliberately walking in when I'm trying to masturbate. They even turn on all the hot water taps when I'm trying to do it in the shower. FML

#21115891
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47471) - you deserved it (18248)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: