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TheZarola

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TheZarola
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8427
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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TheZarola's FML badges

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TheZarola's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that standing next to a hobo doesn't make me look better in comparison, but instead just makes me seem like a hobo as well. FML

#14862794
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7992) - you deserved it (24128)

On 02/06/2011 at 2:37am - money - by 7rafe7 (man) - United States

Today, I was so bored I began practicing an irish jig. For two hours. FML

#14847206
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8859) - you deserved it (21450)

On 02/05/2011 at 12:29am - misc - by Youdontneed2knowmyname - United States (California)

Today, I scraped the ice off my boss's car windows and thought it'd be funny to scrape a swastika in the ice on his roof. I didn't realize until it thawed off that it scratched it into the paint. He didn't find much humor in it and is making me pay for the damage. FML

#14836415
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5669) - you deserved it (68331)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:11am - work - by Username -

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67080) - you deserved it (6317)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got chickenpox. I'm 28 and having chickenpox as an adult is excruciatingly painful. When I told my boss I wasn't going to be at work today because of chickenpox he replied, "That's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Adults don't get chickenpox." He then fired me. FML

#14832801
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35571) - you deserved it (2431)

On 02/03/2011 at 10:19pm - health - by Pox (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the midwest blizzard hit my town, burying the roads in snow. All the local stores are closed. I'm not only currently on my period, but I'm out of pads and toilet paper. FML

#14827819
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39796) - you deserved it (9231)

On 02/03/2011 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while waiting for a job interview, a woman sat down next to me and asked if I was here for the job too. Thinking she was also an applicant, I tried to demoralise her, and said the job was going to be a complete joke. With that, she stood up and said, "Do you still want to go into my office?" She was the interviewer. FML

#14826763
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6753) - you deserved it (65346)

On 02/03/2011 at 1:53pm - work - by parker1993 (man) - United States

Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML

#14811207
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34288) - you deserved it (4273)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:11pm - love - by straightasaneedle (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I was eating breakfast at an IHOP. As I was eating, the old man sitting directly behind me started discussing every aspect of his spastic colon, in vivid detail. FML

#14809738
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18178) - you deserved it (2434)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got up the nerve to invite the guy I like to hang out at my house. It was also the day my mother decided that our house is a "pants optional zone," and that she should implement that policy immediately. While he was at our house. FML

#14802343
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22675) - you deserved it (2339)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16880) - you deserved it (36426)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30752) - you deserved it (3886)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I wrote a 2000 word essay on "Las Vegas - The City That Never Sleeps". I was proud of my work, until someone pointed out that New York is "The City That Never Sleeps", not Vegas. FML

#14793954
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8941) - you deserved it (36384)

On 02/01/2011 at 5:35am - work - by mmaisie (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

#14793203
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25586) - you deserved it (3391)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by Stormbringer -

Today, I had to babysit two kids. I told them to stop fighting, or to sit on separate couches. They stopped. I asked why nobody would sit on the other couch, where I'd been sitting. They told me it was the couch their autistic brother often pees on. FML

#14792187
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24464) - you deserved it (2825)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:11pm - misc - by joxerthemighty39 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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