TheTwistedOtaku

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TheTwistedOtaku

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 July 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4099
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About TheTwistedOtaku : Follow me on Instagram -
Kayra_Marie

TheTwistedOtaku's page activity

Visits<b>weedle99</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 11:33am<b>FaintXxJoexX</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 5:47pm<b>Addiction333</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 3:44pm<b>citrusglass</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 11:36pm<b>rainbowsRlove</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 12:31pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:09am<b>CloudyFromSteam</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:42pm<b>Camwentz</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 1:11am<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:23am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 9:58pm<b>mondesno</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 5:33am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 5:26am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 11:06pm<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 8:58am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 8:13am<b>sleepisweak</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:39am<b>FleibenHolden</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 1:32pm<b>sajupt</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 5:16pm

Fucked!<b>delfino1604</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:09am

TheTwistedOtaku's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

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TheTwistedOtaku's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML

by Hatty / 03/14/2010 at 6:50am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was ecstatic after spending the night with my longtime crush, when he told me he felt something. I poured my heart and soul out to him, confessing my love for him too. Unfortunately, he was referring to a lump in my left breast, which I now need to get checked out. FML

by LadyLump / 01/24/2010 at 1:12pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

by dire-rear / 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm / Singapore / Health

Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML

by cuppincake / 01/15/2010 at 2:51am / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

by notasgood / 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I waited anxiously until midnight to open my Christmas presents. As the clock struck midnight, I ran out into the living room, super-excited to open them, only to discover that everyone in our house had already opened theirs, and had all gone to bed. FML

by iFail / 12/25/2009 at 12:18am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was standing outside a store about to flirt with this guy when my mother drove up and shouted, "Hurry up, I have diarrhea!" FML

by embaressed / 12/19/2009 at 4:44am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML

by Anonymous / 12/13/2009 at 3:39am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my kids how much they loved me. My seven year old responded, 'I'll love you forever mummy.' My sixteen year old responded, 'Can you wind down the window, I just farted.' FML

by ljjprchf / 12/12/2009 at 8:29pm / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I was watching TV with my mom. The new Trojan Ecstasy condom commercial came on. I sat there awkwardly while my mom pulled out her shopping list. I bet you can guess what she added. FML

by aawkward... / 12/09/2009 at 2:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I was standing in a long line at the Post Office when my 3 year old son starts rubbing up and down my leg. I asked him what he was doing and he said loudly. "I'm humping you like Simon humps me!" Everyone looks at me in shocked horror. Simon is our dog. FML

by Sissy / 12/05/2009 at 7:04pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

by buhknee / 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while showing my art work at a festival, a very old cougar walked up to me and asked if I wanted to hook up later. After refusing more than one time, the woman walked away with my business card. I've been getting emails with naked pictures. FML

by deathbysnoosnoo / 11/24/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

by Tucker / 11/18/2009 at 4:35pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy