Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheTwistedOtaku

Search for a member

TheTwistedOtaku

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2100
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About TheTwistedOtaku : Follow me on Instagram -
Kayra_Marie

TheTwistedOtaku's page activity

Visits<b>mikey1</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 4:00pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:18am<b>Angelkisses130</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 4:11pm<b>KagamineRinny</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 5:34pm<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 11:58pm<b>TJ059</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 1:36pm<b>ezrocks4u</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 8:59pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 4:06pm<b>Miss_Swanky</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 8:43am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:34pm<b>swasher</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 9:57pm<b>person961</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 12:57am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 11:42am<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 7:48pm<b>Sinester69</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 1:55pm<b>MyNameIsLaughter</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 2:03pm<b>the4gottendeath</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 9:14pm<b>loveexgirl</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 3:08am

TheTwistedOtaku's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of TheTwistedOtaku's badges

TheTwistedOtaku's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML

#17026293
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29554) - you deserved it (5015)

On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, it has been 8 months since I started a photography project in which I would take a picture of the same tree every day for a year. I just heard a noise outside. They cut the tree down. FML

#16877563
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46386) - you deserved it (4083)

On 06/27/2011 at 3:55am - misc - by A girl - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I found out my dad thinks he's famous because he's been on 'Cops', twice. FML

#16814483
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41984) - you deserved it (3641)

On 06/23/2011 at 10:19am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me why he stood me up last night instead of coming over to visit. Apparently me telling him I couldn't wait for him to do naughty things to me turned him off, and made him feel like a piece of meat. FML

#16717127
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34570) - you deserved it (10325)

On 06/17/2011 at 7:32pm - intimacy - by Willow - United States

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44069) - you deserved it (3122)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I searched frantically for my glasses for ages. After giving up, I realised I could see perfectly. I had been wearing them the whole time and neither my mother nor my father told me because "it was far too funny" watching me yell "Where the fuck are they?" FML

#16115344
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13951) - you deserved it (42109)

On 05/10/2011 at 6:48am - misc - by Kyle (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I came across an old man sitting on the pavement with a bottle of beer in one hand. He was crying. I thought I would be a good Samaritan and see if he was okay. After 15 minutes of hearing about how much his life sucked, he mugged me. FML

#16025758
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33554) - you deserved it (9038)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:24pm - misc - by kimftwxox - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML

#16016488
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8820) - you deserved it (55346)

On 05/02/2011 at 5:33am - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML

#15853054
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29824) - you deserved it (9568)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

#15355329
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43875) - you deserved it (8696)

On 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by Mr. Sensitive Nips - United States (Texas)

Today, on the train, a cute girl gave me her number. After maybe half an hour, she went to her seat and I went to the toilet for a quick but loud and painful dump. I opened the door and saw her outside getting bitch-slapped by the smell. FML

#15172476
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27083) - you deserved it (9119)

On 03/02/2011 at 3:16am - misc - by Noguestlist -

Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

#14913513
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7565) - you deserved it (46598)

On 02/09/2011 at 8:12pm - misc - by inosehowthatgotthere (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because his iPod app said I was cheating. FML

#14797285
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45743) - you deserved it (4920)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36291) - you deserved it (4800)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML

#14743806
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26146) - you deserved it (12582)

On 01/28/2011 at 2:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: