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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 July 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3499
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About TheTwistedOtaku : Follow me on Instagram -

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TheTwistedOtaku's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the doctor. I told her I felt down all the time. She asked me a few questions and she told me I was depressed. She suggested to go home and find the sources of my depression. When I told my parents, they started laughing and said "Yeah, right." I think I found my source. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51917) - you deserved it (3607)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by farrahfarrest_ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14489) - you deserved it (63916)

On 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm - misc - by ZZ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48255) - you deserved it (28452)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21395) - you deserved it (47627)

On 06/22/2009 at 2:06am - animals - by Ketchup (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27195) - you deserved it (88674)

On 04/24/2009 at 11:18am - animals - by Anonymousagb (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I was on a friends trampoline trying to convince my mom trampolines are safe and I should get one. While telling her I smashed my knee into my face. I jumped off bleeding, slipped, hit my head on the trampoline, and got knocked unconscious. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43160) - you deserved it (33696)

On 04/19/2009 at 5:44pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML


I agree, your life sucks (107676) - you deserved it (5764)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (214599) - you deserved it (34242)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML


I agree, your life sucks (74437) - you deserved it (12648)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (168071) - you deserved it (15349)

On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to tell my super-conservative parents that I had just gone to visit the boyfriend I'm not supposed to have so that I could tell him I am pregnant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21614) - you deserved it (54595)

On 02/23/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I shook hands with a girl and held onto her hand while telling her she had very tiny, delicate hands. When I let go to look at them, I discovered she only had two fingers. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13786) - you deserved it (36795)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by KWM (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML


I agree, your life sucks (90982) - you deserved it (19243)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by douglisk1994 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

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