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Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
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TheSpottedZebra's favorite FMLs
by collegebroke / 09/22/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Money
by Anonymous / 09/22/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the side walk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML
by sydstreet / 04/09/2012 at 1:31am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I witnessed my husband swat a coffee bean over and over again, all the while mistaking it for a fly. I then figured he probably has a lower IQ than I do, which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't a few points away from minor retardation. FML
by sheilob / 03/24/2012 at 7:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
by Rachal / 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML
by tommyboy783 / 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by Ahhwtf / 08/18/2009 at 7:47am / United States (Washington) / Health
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- Today, I spent 5 hours organizing my porn collection on my computer. What the hell am I doing with… Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight… Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked…