About TheSnakeDoctor20 : Let's be truthful here, I'm afraid of snakes and you're a stalker. I like long walks on the beach and glazed donuts. My girlfriend is chained up in the basement and I'm from NY and I love pizza
Thank you for stalking me, if you want to talk msg me.
Love your grapist,
TheSnakeDoctor20
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19696) - you deserved it (2250)
On 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by Badkitty14 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my sister and I were watching the Olympics. Michael Phelps was on the screen, and I was thinking how hot he is. My sister commented on how he looks so much like our brother. I can never look at either of them the same way ever again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16885) - you deserved it (2552)
On 08/01/2012 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I got on a two hour train ride to go to a concert. I had been so caught up in handling the train tickets that halfway to the concert, I realized I had left the concert tickets on my dresser. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16064) - you deserved it (5415)
On 07/24/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by sirensaresexy - United States (New York)
Today, I had a dream that my ex-boyfriend had become a vicious serial killer and was hunting me down because I broke up with him. I don't know what scares me more: the way he hunted me in my sleep, or the fact that it wouldn't surprise me if it actually happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16161) - you deserved it (2355)
On 07/19/2012 at 11:55am - love - by InsomniacToBe - United States (Utah)
Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21801) - you deserved it (2208)
On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)
Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23864) - you deserved it (2632)
On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23864) - you deserved it (2632)
On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14972) - you deserved it (1351)
On 07/04/2012 at 10:55pm - misc - by notestojenn - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my boyfriend proposed. Two hours later I get a text from my ex announcing he has just been diagnosed with chlamydia. I now have to explain this to my fiancé. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11378) - you deserved it (19690)
On 07/04/2012 at 10:45am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I asked the 7-year-old that I was babysitting if he could burp on command. He said he could, and began to demonstrate. It turns out he couldn't purposely burp, but he definitely could vomit on command. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5849) - you deserved it (16262)
On 07/03/2012 at 7:33am - kids - by ew (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18499) - you deserved it (1207)
On 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6815) - you deserved it (31964)
On 06/24/2012 at 5:45pm - kids - by :( (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I told my girlfriend I love her for the first time. She said, "Thanks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19963) - you deserved it (2477)
Today, I proudly told my elitist dad that I now have a beautiful girlfriend. He didn't believe me, so I showed him her Facebook. He demanded that I stop seeing her, saying that the duck-facing in her avatar was the hallmark of "a lower form of being" who would only ever shame our family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8215) - you deserved it (17868)
On 06/12/2012 at 7:39pm - love - by idontgetit (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awake during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15429) - you deserved it (7364)
On 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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