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TheOnlyMizLiv

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TheOnlyMizLiv
  • Town/Country : California, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 681
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About TheOnlyMizLiv : Sorry if I said something dumb. It happens. Plus this is the internet and I will proably never meet any of you sooo, there's that. I dig horses, science, medicine, video-games, and mary jane. Keep it casual! :*

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100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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TheOnlyMizLiv's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML

#21113687
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36345) - you deserved it (4982)

On 04/15/2014 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47004) - you deserved it (3523)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I reduced my psychologist to tears. FML

#20976567
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39778) - you deserved it (3435)

On 12/01/2013 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57927) - you deserved it (4168)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, I swallowed and nearly choked to death on the ring my boyfriend hid in my wine glass. It's still in me somewhere, and my doctor basically told me that I'll have to "keep an eye on things" if I want to find it. FML

#20967683
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42828) - you deserved it (5066)

On 11/23/2013 at 5:32am - love - by fecal romance (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22028) - you deserved it (72202)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, I returned from a 5-day cruise for my senior spring break, filled with gorgeous sorority girls from all over the country. I was seasick the whole time. FML

#20553243
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26721) - you deserved it (4431)

On 03/21/2013 at 1:59am - misc - by captainlame (man) - United States



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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