Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheForgetfulOne

Offline (the 10/17/2014 at 6:34am) | Search for a member

TheForgetfulOne

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2353
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheForgetfulOne : I'm very quiet and reclusive. I don't really talk much. I don't like being stuck in large crowds of people. I don't care about stereotypes and I try not to pay any attention to them. I can't stand carrying on a conversation with one person for a very long time. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people chew food with their open. In my spare time I like playing chess, listening to music, reading stories on FML and not much else. I listen to a wide-range of rock music from classic, alternative, punk, modern, and some heavy metal. The only rock music I don't really listen to is screamo.

TheForgetfulOne's page activity

Visits<b>JustABoredKid</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 6:05pm<b>caggybandicoot</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 5:27pm<b>Guardian88</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 10:08am<b>jillytc</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 5:47am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:11am<b>CynicalAhole22</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 11:07pm<b>masterofall100</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 3:28pm<b>MickeyIsAKitty</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 2:03pm<b>MilkyFilmz</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 3:58pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 1:34am<b>hawright</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 7:20am<b>CH4O</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 12:10pm

TheForgetfulOne's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of TheForgetfulOne's badges

TheForgetfulOne's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, I realized that my boyfriend only has sex with me to get me to shut up. FML

#20827840
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44548) - you deserved it (19071)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by blissful oblivion (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

#20827779
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46288) - you deserved it (6205)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm - kids - by JuggaloSlasher15 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48863) - you deserved it (4330)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized I'm getting my period pretty soon. How? I started crying and throwing plates because I thought we were out of sweet bread. FML

#20825062
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40504) - you deserved it (15777)

On 08/07/2013 at 2:51am - health - by FuckYouMotherNature - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

#20823279
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45108) - you deserved it (8851)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68261) - you deserved it (9006)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML

#20820394
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42718) - you deserved it (4231)

On 08/04/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by newbffswelcome (man) - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59709) - you deserved it (7583)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML

#20814794
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67373) - you deserved it (5813)

On 08/01/2013 at 3:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML

#20812086
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49088) - you deserved it (5456)

On 07/30/2013 at 7:19pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50081) - you deserved it (7423)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia

Today, I was mistaken for my twin brother twice. This probably wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't a girl. FML

#20807504
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44826) - you deserved it (4195)

On 07/28/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Mia (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40285) - you deserved it (27229)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: