About TheFamilyElf : Hello, curious person. I'm not here to get into serious discussions/arguments about life, religion, or morals. I'm here to laugh at other people's misery and at those who choose to spend their time arguing on FML. Does that make me a bad person? Hmm.... Oh well.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (68679) - you deserved it (3075)
On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35663) - you deserved it (12257)
On 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm - misc - by Magicali (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a segway. He still got away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34949) - you deserved it (7801)
On 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand
Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17210) - you deserved it (1002)
On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8177) - you deserved it (14773)
On 11/23/2012 at 10:10am - animals - by Jeanna S. - United States
Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17406) - you deserved it (1018)
On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5385) - you deserved it (26373)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12858) - you deserved it (935)
On 11/18/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by mountains - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18210) - you deserved it (1142)
On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)
Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20612) - you deserved it (4575)
On 10/08/2012 at 5:12am - love - by embarrassed (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7991) - you deserved it (30517)
On 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada
Today, I unintentionally moaned during my prostate exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24487) - you deserved it (4521)
On 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21683) - you deserved it (4925) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 09/21/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by minibuch1505 - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18339) - you deserved it (1973)
On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20919) - you deserved it (1751)
On 08/24/2012 at 11:45am - animals - by alix - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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