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TheFailthDoctor

Offline (the 01/30/2014 at 7:50pm) | Search for a member

TheFailthDoctor

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  • Number of visits : 477
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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TheFailthDoctor's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a comedy show with my mom, and they asked the audience members to yell out their problems as ideas for an improv skit. My mom yelled, "My daughter can't get a boyfriend!" FML

#21222137
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (2161)

On 07/27/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by Yeppets (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML

#21222062
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30213) - you deserved it (3202)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:12pm - love - by fingwhore (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found my 6 year old daughter upstairs lying on the floor with scissors. She was giving "the carpet a haircut." FML

#21221737
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22988) - you deserved it (2886)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:51am - kids - by ... (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

#21221361
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23300) - you deserved it (3803)

On 07/26/2014 at 6:09pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I went back to work after a vacation, only to find out I'll soon be forced to dress up as one of the princesses from Frozen to promote our store. FML

#21221108
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31331) - you deserved it (4452)

On 07/26/2014 at 12:29pm - work - by PrincessPromotion (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I lost my wedding ring at work. It wouldn't be too hard to track down, except that I work at Heinz. If you find it in your mayonnaise, keep it. FML

Today, it's my birthday. The only thing I received was a bill for a piss test I took earlier this year. FML

#21220823
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30326) - you deserved it (2898)

On 07/26/2014 at 12:55am - misc - by birthday girl - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I went on a date with an extremely cute girl. About 30 minutes in, she excused herself to the restroom. I waited for about 20 minutes, then I got up and left. About 10 minutes later, she called asking where I was. FML

Today, I woke up from a nap to find my little brother playing some games on my phone. A few hours later I come to find he had deleted all 500 pictures from my trip to Europe last month. He needed more space to download the games. Mom says he's too young to understand what he did wrong. He's 14. FML

#21219527
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42841) - you deserved it (4159)

On 07/24/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by stupid older sister (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I tried fixing my dad's lawnmower after he said, "Girls can't change a lightbulb right, let alone fix a machine." An hour later, when I had the lawnmower running again, he bitched me out for trying to make him "look stupid." He's been sulking and acting pissy ever since. FML

#21218479
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47114) - you deserved it (4117)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41501) - you deserved it (10914)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my little sister was being picked on by some kids. After seeing one push her, I went over to talk to them about how bullying isn't cool and how they need to play nice. They beat me up. I'm 22 years old and got beat up by a group of 10 year olds. FML

#21218239
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36695) - you deserved it (12313)

On 07/23/2014 at 12:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19461) - you deserved it (45733)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

#21217343
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50059) - you deserved it (39245)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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