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Offline (the 06/14/2014 at 10:45am) | Search for a member
About TheElderTROLLZ : My shit is always happy when I flush it. Wanna know more? I own a van with no windows. Why? Because I live in there and don't want anyone to know. Duh.
Why does Dante have short hair and why the fuck is Vergil nice to Dante?!
I don't like The Elder Scrolls series anymore.
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Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML
Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML
Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML
Today, I had a terrible nightmare involving zombies slashing and eating at my face. I woke up in terror and urine, and found the slashing was very real: it was my cat pawing my face for me to feed him. FML
Friday 27 March 2015