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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out "well fuck you too". Very awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9761) - you deserved it (26910)
On 03/23/2013 at 8:38pm - misc - by Kjer (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31391) - you deserved it (3334)
On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36260) - you deserved it (2251)
On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29282) - you deserved it (6732)
On 03/23/2013 at 1:44am - love - by SierraDiaz2097 - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I found myself arguing with a 6-year-old over a game of tag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10605) - you deserved it (21365)
On 03/20/2013 at 6:08pm - kids - by tspence - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He went to fist bump me and I missed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (5862)
On 03/20/2013 at 10:31am - work - by missedfistbump - United States
Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20168) - you deserved it (2878)
On 03/20/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous - United States
Today, it's my third night of finally living on my own in a house. I can't count the number of times I have run to my knife and pepper spray after hearing "suspicious" sounds. Maybe I'm not ready to be an adult after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23482) - you deserved it (6242)
On 03/19/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by nearly20yetasfearfulasatoddlerhavingnightmares (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband woke up, rolled over, and said, "Good morning, beautiful." He hasn't called me that in months, but as I was about to reply, I realized he was talking to his pet turtle, not me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31307) - you deserved it (1962)
On 03/18/2013 at 3:38pm - love - by Maggie - United States
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a chicken nugget fetish. He wants me to take a chicken nugget bath in a bikini. He seems to be dead serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34476) - you deserved it (2576)
On 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by chickenmcnuggetgirl (woman) - Ireland (Meath)
Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36303) - you deserved it (9425)
On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland
Today, at work, I walked in on a disoriented elderly woman eating nachos and cheese off the bathroom floor. She wasn't wearing any pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27534) - you deserved it (1891)
On 03/17/2013 at 11:14pm - work - by Ihatemyjob (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was outside at a café and looked at my phone. When I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31191) - you deserved it (1768)
On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19405) - you deserved it (35570)
On 03/17/2013 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Cliché... or Touché? -
Today, my social anxiety got so bad that I spent an entire raffle game desperately praying that I'd lose miserably, just so I wouldn't have to go up on stage and accept it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21674) - you deserved it (3761)
On 03/16/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by Minou (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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