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Offline (the 07/24/2016 at 4:50am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15366
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About TheDragonsGuard : Message me if you want to talk!

ThePaperDragon is cool people, we're buddies irl.

TheDragonsGuard's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 9:04pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 2:20am<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 9:17am<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 11:06am<b>Trace01m</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 12:37am<b>duduv2</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 6:46am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:37am<b>stryder9090</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 8:03am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 11:52am<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:42am<b>iamscott</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:16am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 10:24pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 8:39pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 6:17pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 10:53pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 9:55am<b>kintoki25</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 7:57pm<b>killuaxgon</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 4:07pm

Fucked!<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 5:07pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 3:58pm<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 7:43am<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 2:39am<b>killuaxgon</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 10:07pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 4:32am<b>minimanion</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 4:13am<b>zeusdom</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 6:15am<b>Teyros</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 2:47am<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:23am<b>PurpleKicks</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 7:51am<b>christian1509</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 10:43am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 5:05am<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:50am<b>Coco_Tolisso8</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:30pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:21pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 10:53pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:41am

TheDragonsGuard's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

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See all of TheDragonsGuard's badges

TheDragonsGuard's favorite FMLs

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

by unashamed / 06/05/2014 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, my boyfriend complained all day about being bored, so wanting to cheer him up, I put on some sexy clothes and went to his house. I got on his bed in my underwear and called him over. He quickly decided he'd rather play Diablo for the next five hours instead. FML

by Justawoman / 06/04/2014 at 11:52am / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Intimacy

Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich aromas of fecal matter" is not a good subject to use as an ice breaker for making friends. FML

by Aether / 06/03/2014 at 6:51pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally finished a drawing that someone had asked and said they would pay me for. I worked on it for multiple hours and was very proud of it. When it came to discussing payment, I asked what his best offer was. A pack of cigarettes. FML

by xerrika / 06/03/2014 at 7:56am / Canada (Ontario) / Money

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I told someone about my degree in technical theatre with a concentration in lighting design. They looked at me and said, "You're paid $52,000 a year to turn lights on and off?" And technically, that's correct. FML

by ugh / 06/01/2014 at 6:15pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work

Today, I got written up for asking my coworker a question that I should have asked my boss to ask my coworker. Yay bureaucracy. FML

by not paid enough / 06/01/2014 at 5:03pm / United States (Tennessee) / Work

Today, I clogged my girlfriend's toilet, so being a gentleman, I tried to rectify the situation. I plunged the holy fuck out of that damned toilet, only for her to accuse me of jacking off because I was taking so long. When she stormed in and the smell hit her, she called me a pig. I just can't win. FML

by shart up, your puns suck / 06/01/2014 at 2:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

by help me / 06/01/2014 at 11:51am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

by wendtinmypants / 05/31/2014 at 11:05am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my wife muttering "God, I want you so bad". Figuring she was either talking to me or longing for the second cumming of Christ, I turned over to see which. Turned out she was rubbing one out to some guy's Facebook photos on her phone. FML

by lahiros / 05/30/2014 at 6:05pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, for the first time in my life, my dad said he was proud of me. It meant a lot to me, and I started tearing up. Noticing my emotion, he looked at me pityingly, said "Aaaaand it's gone." and walked out of the room. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2014 at 5:04pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML

by get a grip, son / 05/30/2014 at 4:37pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my psycho, animal-hating neighbour "accidentally" ran over my cat. This is the second time he's "accidentally" done this to a neighbourhood pet since he moved in, three weeks ago. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2014 at 1:28pm / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, out of habit from twelve years of karate classes, I bowed to my teacher as I exited my classroom. My chemistry classroom. FML

by mathesonn / 05/29/2014 at 7:32pm / United States (New York) / Work