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Offline (the 07/24/2016 at 4:50am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15338
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About TheDragonsGuard : Message me if you want to talk!

ThePaperDragon is cool people, we're buddies irl.

TheDragonsGuard's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 9:04pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 2:20am<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 9:17am<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 11:06am<b>Trace01m</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 12:37am<b>duduv2</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 6:46am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:37am<b>stryder9090</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 8:03am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 11:52am<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:42am<b>iamscott</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:16am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 10:24pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 8:39pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 6:17pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 10:53pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 9:55am<b>kintoki25</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 7:57pm<b>killuaxgon</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 4:07pm

Fucked!<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 5:07pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 3:58pm<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 7:43am<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 2:39am<b>killuaxgon</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 10:07pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 4:32am<b>minimanion</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 4:13am<b>zeusdom</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 6:15am<b>Teyros</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 2:47am<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:23am<b>PurpleKicks</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 7:51am<b>christian1509</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 10:43am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 5:05am<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:50am<b>Coco_Tolisso8</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:30pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:21pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 10:53pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:41am

TheDragonsGuard's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of TheDragonsGuard's badges

TheDragonsGuard's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML

by noweddingforyou / 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally handed my girlfriend a portrait of her. I'm not the best drawer, but I spent weeks on it and I thought it turned out pretty good. When she looked at it, she asked what kind of dog was it. FML

by Laserbeaver / 09/29/2013 at 9:00am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML

by -__-" / 09/29/2013 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

by :( / 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my boss' son is training to take over my job as head translator, after having convinced his dad that he's fluent in Spanish, and that my skills suck. I soon walked in on him using Google Translate on a legal document. My boss refuses to believe me. FML

by anahira6 / 09/27/2013 at 3:41pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML

by ihatethisjob / 09/27/2013 at 4:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, while cleaning tables at the fast food place where I work, I had to remove two human teeth from a table top. FML

by pancakessdsjsn / 09/27/2013 at 2:04am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2013 at 12:19pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, yet again, I got to my desk at work at 8 AM to find my laptop turned on and porn sites opened. Weird porn sites. I have no idea who is doing this, or how they have access to my office, or how they got my login password. HR thinks I'm making this up. FML

Today, some asshat chewed me out over a 10 cent late fine he was charged on his library card. When I tried to explain the fine to him, he started mimicking me. Finally, as he chucked a dime at my head before storming out, I saw the glint of a Rolex watch from beneath his power suit. FML

by DimeShapedBruise / 09/24/2013 at 2:14am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, at my job as a fourth grade teacher, I realized that most of my students have far nicer and more expensive phones than I can afford. FML

by poor teacher / 09/23/2013 at 1:54pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I hit a new low in my financial troubles when I left my work to retrieve twenty-five cents after seeing someone drop it across the street. FML

by collegebroke / 09/22/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Money

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

by dadyoureacunt / 09/21/2013 at 9:10am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous