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TheDragonsGuard

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TheDragonsGuard
  • Town/Country : Chicago, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 September 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1481
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About TheDragonsGuard : Message me if you want to know anything.

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TheDragonsGuard's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML

#20405524
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46522) - you deserved it (2641)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by daughterinlaw (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend grabbed my boob, shook it savagely, and shouted "Earthquake!" FML

#20404037
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25405) - you deserved it (6398)

On 12/17/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Ape (woman) - United States

Today, my car window got smashed in. The cop that came to take the report said they'd already caught the guy doing it, he'd smashed in several other car windows, all of the exact same model and color. His reason for doing it was simple: he was drunk and "hated red Jeeps". FML

#20403025
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24687) - you deserved it (2448)

On 12/17/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by Cold (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

#20402614
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28620) - you deserved it (8161)

On 12/16/2012 at 7:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
129 comments

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

#20400604
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21528) - you deserved it (1673)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother paid the DJ $300 to ruin my wedding by playing the Imperial Death March as I walked down the aisle. FML

#20400363
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30554) - you deserved it (4017)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML

#20399775
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26421) - you deserved it (7163)

On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML

#20399692
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13706) - you deserved it (1274)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:20pm - misc - by theslutmuncher (man) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)

Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML

#20397679
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18300) - you deserved it (1191)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20556) - you deserved it (4918)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31130) - you deserved it (1604)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15500) - you deserved it (1416)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23125) - you deserved it (1232)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19537) - you deserved it (5357)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)



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