TheDragonsGuard

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Offline (the 07/24/2016 at 4:50am)

TheDragonsGuard

118Fucked!

TheDragonsGuardTheDragonsGuard
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15663
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About TheDragonsGuard : Message me if you want to talk!

ThePaperDragon is cool people, we're buddies irl.

TheDragonsGuard's page activity

Visits<b>stryder9090</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 2:07pm<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 1:35am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 7:51pm<b>_trixxx_trolls_</b> - the 11/13/2016 at 4:31am<b>Mons</b> - the 11/10/2016 at 3:01pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 9:04pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 2:20am<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 9:17am<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 11:06am<b>Trace01m</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 12:37am<b>duduv2</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 6:46am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:37am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 11:52am<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:42am<b>iamscott</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 1:16am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 10:24pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 8:39pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 6:17pm

Fucked!<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 5:07pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 3:58pm<b>dburton</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 7:43am<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 2:39am<b>killuaxgon</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 10:07pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 4:32am<b>minimanion</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 4:13am<b>zeusdom</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 6:15am<b>Teyros</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 2:47am<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:23am<b>PurpleKicks</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 7:51am<b>christian1509</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 10:43am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 5:05am<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:50am<b>Coco_Tolisso8</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:30pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:21pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 10:53pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:41am

TheDragonsGuard's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of TheDragonsGuard's badges

TheDragonsGuard's favorite FMLs

Today, through a mutual friend, I met the girl of my dreams. After flirting and exchanging numbers with her, my friend confessed that she's liked me since the day we met. Now the girl of my dreams doesn't want to pursue a relationship with me out of respect for our friend. FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 4:20pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I'm 4ft9 "tall" and I always have trouble reaching things that are high up. It's my birthday, and I got three footstools as gifts. FML

by mini matthylde / 11/19/2015 at 4:57am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

by Pandamomma / 07/21/2014 at 8:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

by murrrrf / 07/21/2014 at 1:30am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to check up on a 400-pound inmate who was very upset about being locked up. When I got to his cell, he threw one of his own turds at me through the bars. I took a hit. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2014 at 1:23am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too nice. Apparently, me being nice to him makes him feel guilty. FML

by toonice / 07/17/2014 at 4:48pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

by fuck you, kid / 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, while out grocery shopping with my mother, she asked me to hold a large bag of rice for her. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd been absent-mindedly stroking it the whole time, just like when I pick up my cat. FML

Today, I returned to my teaching job at a local community college after surfing for the weekend. I'd got sunburned, one student immediately noticed and said to me, "Morning, Mr. Pinky!" Now they all do it. My students are assholes. I hate teaching. FML

by mister_pinky / 07/15/2014 at 6:04pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

by NoSexForMe / 07/13/2014 at 3:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my brother decided to help me artificially age some of my artwork by singeing the edges slightly. Apparently "my brother set fire to my homework" isn't a valid excuse. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Kids

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

by and god shat / 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation / 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

by dammit hearing aid / 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm / United States (Iowa) / Work