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TheCrispyCat

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TheCrispyCat

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 618
  • Number of comments : 229
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About TheCrispyCat : What ya doin Spiceman?!?

TheCrispyCat's page activity

Visits<b>Hieroglyph</b> - 3 hours ago<b>NotAUser</b> - 8 hours ago<b>julako</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Theghostlyisaiah</b> - 12 hours ago<b>Kyle1dc</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:12pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:57pm<b>zachhewett</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:23pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:13pm<b>anormalperson</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:38am<b>angeljade1234</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 6:12am<b>whattfreshhhelll</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 11:38pm<b>coolifly</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 9:56pm<b>fmlderp123</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 7:25pm<b>aireeahna</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:36am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:27am<b>Taira_Yuzuki</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 11:09pm<b>bmt014</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 3:56am<b>basicalec</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 3:22am

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TheCrispyCat's favorite FMLs

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18912) - you deserved it (3520)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML

#21240389
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35503) - you deserved it (3812)

On 08/18/2014 at 8:10am - kids - by I hate children - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML

#21239602
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40615) - you deserved it (4528)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41743) - you deserved it (6834)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

#21237384
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34602) - you deserved it (4516)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:06am - animals - by hopeless romantic - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took part in a raffle that was being organised in the small countryside village where I'm vacationing. I live in big city. I won a duck. A real, live duck. FML

#21237143
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33300) - you deserved it (7718) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/14/2014 at 12:38am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

#21236507
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36210) - you deserved it (3381)

On 08/13/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37101) - you deserved it (8806)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36031) - you deserved it (21890)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I decided to spend a few days at my grandma's house, to help her clean the place up a bit. So far, she's given me a "no masturbating under my roof" talk, used multiple racist slurs, and yelled "QUIET DOWN!" when I so much as sneezed in the next room. FML

#21234785
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34400) - you deserved it (2954)

On 08/11/2014 at 11:02am - misc - by welptimetoburntheplacedown (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46507) - you deserved it (18312)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35463) - you deserved it (5925)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States

Today, I wore a tank top for the first time in a few years. It turned out even worse than the last time. I got insulted by several people over my "Never say never" upper chest tattoo, which I got years ago, before the words ever became associated with a certain douchy Canadian pop "singer". FML

#21230914
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41428) - you deserved it (9089)

On 08/06/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by beaverfever (man) - Poland (Zachodniopomorskie)

Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML

#21229943
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35687) - you deserved it (16265)

On 08/05/2014 at 8:31am - kids - by ihatespiders (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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