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TheCitizens96

Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 1:50am) | Search for a member

TheCitizens96

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1114
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheCitizens96 : Me? I'd say I'm pretty chill and even easy-going, but I also appreciate people who use correct grammar. :)

.... Zombies. Horror movies. Football (Manchester City). Black Ops. Hot guys..... Enough Said.

Oh! And no, I don't have a kik. So please, don't ask. I'm not gonna make one for you, doesn't matter who the hell you are. ;P

However, I do have an Instagram. Don't be afraid to ask. ;P

TheCitizens96's page activity

Visits<b>Stephanie001_</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:42pm<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 3:58am<b>bridgprich</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 11:18am<b>topalov</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:22am<b>gis0392</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:19pm<b>A07</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 12:24pm<b>FkTheWorld7</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 3:20am<b>totallybananas</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 4:42pm<b>RedNinjaTurtle</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:51am<b>Feijai</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 12:27am<b>robbedoes</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:52am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 3:46am<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:59pm<b>adrianvons</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:52am<b>Ecudaniel</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 10:36pm<b>mandygrl25</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 2:08am<b>Arieslink</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:51pm<b>Rawrshi</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:44pm

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TheCitizens96's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

#21242605
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39965) - you deserved it (4813)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37972) - you deserved it (7906) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37842) - you deserved it (2549)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48641) - you deserved it (21136)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49281) - you deserved it (11702)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to take my cat to the vet. On the way there, he managed to get out of his cage, climb into the front seat, onto my chest, and howl in my face as I tried to drive down the highway. I ended up with stitches and still got charged for missing my cat's appointment. FML

#21216576
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38108) - you deserved it (4918)

On 07/21/2014 at 6:49pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I decided to try something new with my boyfriend, and sexted him. My text ended up sounding so stupid that I panicked and quickly sent another saying "SORRY WRONG PERSON". FML

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46222) - you deserved it (14225)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

#21180513
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45866) - you deserved it (7656)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:33am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45945) - you deserved it (6957)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML

#21137666
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57880) - you deserved it (5623)

On 05/12/2014 at 12:01pm - love - by bambam - United States (Texas)

Today, after a long day at work, I was starving, so I stopped by the drive-through for something to eat. When I got home and hurriedly opened the bag, all I found inside was napkins. Thanks, McDonald's. FML

#21136073
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41874) - you deserved it (10057)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:34pm - work - by can't eat paper - United States

Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not to grope me. He responded by throwing his bedpan at me. It was full. FML

#21130965
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42362) - you deserved it (3570)

On 05/04/2014 at 10:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML

#21124338
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43141) - you deserved it (6041)

On 04/27/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Shit (man) - United States (California)



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