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TheCitizens96

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TheCitizens96

36Liked!

TheCitizens96TheCitizens96
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1893
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheCitizens96 : Me? I'd say I'm pretty chill and easy-going, but I also appreciate people who use correct spelling/grammar. :) Trilingual college student studying to be an Accountant. 👌

.... Zombies. Horror movies. Football (Manchester City). Black Ops. Hot guys..... Enough Said.

I enjoy being outdoors and doing things like fishing, hiking, and canoeing. I love to work out, and I greatly enjoy watching Sylvester Stallone films.

I do have an Instagram, and I probably won't bite... So, don't be afraid to ask. ;P

TheCitizens96's page activity

Visits<b>morondon000</b> - 24 hours ago<b>jad0016</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:47am<b>kayladayla</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:05am<b>Derk76</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:26pm<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:28am<b>davidxflow</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 10:08am<b>pooldude</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:22pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 12:06am<b>mhb210</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 12:26pm<b>Robby2448</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 2:20pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 2:05pm<b>bcoe</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:40am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 2:28am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 1:04am<b>thefella</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 7:42pm<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 9:19am<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:08am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 3:36am

Liked!<b>insanecutie</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 7:04am<b>twistedtwincity</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 8:48am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 5:40am<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 8:59pm<b>zman5267</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 7:57pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 6:58pm<b>Robby2448</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 6:21pm<b>countrygirl256</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 8:04am<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 12:05am<b>RedSoloCup</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 7:16pm<b>Corey122726</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 11:57am<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:31am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:30pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:32am<b>0void0</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 8:44pm<b>westmall21</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:15am<b>Stoppy23</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 10:54pm<b>kAPISH</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:55pm

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TheCitizens96's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with a swollen lump on my throat. It's extremely painful. My dad named it Gretchen and now talks about it as if it's a person. FML

#21311698
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26625) - you deserved it (2193)

On 12/04/2014 at 10:29pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37583) - you deserved it (10590)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

#21285040
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33256) - you deserved it (5367)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47353) - you deserved it (3523)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40231) - you deserved it (5629)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31683) - you deserved it (18235)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37369) - you deserved it (5010)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my girlfriend got her period. It seemed more painful for her than usual, so I offered to go out and buy some painkillers and maybe some chocolate for her. She thought I was being sarcastic and slapped me so hard I saw stars. FML

#21245120
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40492) - you deserved it (3495)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:58pm - misc - by nhyari (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39995) - you deserved it (7273)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

#21242605
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46359) - you deserved it (5176)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (9387) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38788) - you deserved it (2578)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49183) - you deserved it (21256)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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