Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheCamoWulf

Search for a member

TheCamoWulf

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12047
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

TheCamoWulf's page activity

Visits<b>Defalt</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:42pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:20pm<b>davered89</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 9:03am<b>krundale</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 4:33am<b>Devon00</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:31pm<b>fuck_toast</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 8:48pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 10:58pm<b>Bel2001</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 6:04am<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 3:53am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:44pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 6:47pm<b>baconator666</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:15pm<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:35pm<b>beaubeau1993</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:22am<b>turtle_turtle_4</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:42pm<b>ZahnerD</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 8:51am<b>OfCarse</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:39am<b>nmorris95</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 12:57am

TheCamoWulf's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of TheCamoWulf's badges

TheCamoWulf's favorite FMLs

Today, I picked up my cat and it went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML

#2835
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23835) - you deserved it (2446)

On 01/27/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by Anizzaf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I picked up my cat and it went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML

#2835
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23835) - you deserved it (2446)

On 01/27/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by Anizzaf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I sang the itsy bitsy spider song with a class of thirty 20 somethings because we're going to be kindergarten teachers. She made us do the hand motions too. FML

#2762
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6764) - you deserved it (21254)

On 01/27/2009 at 3:10am - work - by duh - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15480) - you deserved it (67667)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, one of the kids I was babysitting tried to hard boil eggs using the microwave. You cannot hard boil eggs using the microwave. It makes a mess. This we have learned. FML

#2695
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7604) - you deserved it (17984)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:08pm - misc - by Danana - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML

#2645
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26540) - you deserved it (2196)

On 01/26/2009 at 10:51am - love - by saywhat - United States (Indiana)

Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML

#2596
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22122) - you deserved it (4612)

On 01/25/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by Michelle C - United States (California)

Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML

#2596
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22122) - you deserved it (4612)

On 01/25/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by Michelle C - United States (California)

Today, while I was babysitting my nephews, the 7 year old boy walked up to me and asked if I was a lesbian. I laughed it off. An argument ensued about my sexuality for a good two hours. I lost. FML

#2591
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24739) - you deserved it (3694)

On 01/25/2009 at 9:51pm - kids - by ThatsNotRight - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was in a hurry to get to work, and in my car I had two drinks settled down in my cup holder. One was my coffee, and the other was an unfinished cup of coffee where I ash and toss my cigarettes. FML

#2590
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4527) - you deserved it (24047)

On 01/25/2009 at 9:38pm - misc - by smoker - United States (California)

Today, the pharmacy lady wished me a happy birthday. I was buying the morning after pill. FML

#2565
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28076) - you deserved it (7085)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by God hates me - United States (Texas)

Today, I am studying abroad in Mexico and someone asked me what it's like to be from Minnesota. I responded in Spanish, in front of thirty people, what I thought translated to, "If you get cold, you can just put on a jacket." Apparently, what I thought meant "jacket" actually meant "masturbate". FML

#2562
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17139) - you deserved it (4399)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by Sally - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I downloaded the 'Dark was the Night' compilation made for charity. I have no soul. FML

#2527
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4127) - you deserved it (21439)

On 01/25/2009 at 12:52pm - misc - by Champs - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a ball rolled up to me, so I picked it up and threw it over the school wall. A little boy who was behind me asked for his ball back. It's Sunday and the school is closed. FML

#2505
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7198) - you deserved it (30444)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:36am - misc - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a text message saying "I'm sorry, I know it's our 4 month anniversary but it's not working out, I need to break up with you" followed by her complaining that I never call her as well. WTF? I haven't had a girlfriend for 6 months. FML

#2488
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20865) - you deserved it (2170)

On 01/24/2009 at 11:25pm - love - by EpicFail - Canada (Alberta)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: