Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheCamoWulf

Search for a member

TheCamoWulf

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 22287
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

TheCamoWulf's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:43am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:08pm<b>Defalt</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:42pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:20pm<b>davered89</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 9:03am<b>krundale</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 4:33am<b>Devon00</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:31pm<b>fuck_toast</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 8:48pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 10:58pm<b>Bel2001</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 6:04am<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 3:53am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:44pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 6:47pm<b>baconator666</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:15pm<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:35pm<b>beaubeau1993</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:22am<b>turtle_turtle_4</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:42pm<b>ZahnerD</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 8:51am

TheCamoWulf's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of TheCamoWulf's badges

TheCamoWulf's favorite FMLs

Today, after work I went to the parking lot to my car to go home. I found my car doors heavily scratched and all my tires cut, with a note on my windshield. The note read, "F*** you, Jackson." I'm Tyler. Jackson is my co-worker. FML

#402387
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (189381) - you deserved it (9817)

On 03/16/2009 at 11:17pm - work - by Dansonn (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad gave me a promise ring on my one year anniversary with my boyfriend and made me swear I would wait til marriage. Four hours later he walked in on us having sex in my bedroom. FML

#400298
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49885) - you deserved it (252409)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by thiswouldhappen. - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

#391986
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (178796) - you deserved it (34678)

On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found an old dress in my house laying around. I decided to dye it green to wear it out on St. Patrick's day. Turns out it was my grandmother's wedding dress that my sister was planning to wear for her wedding. FML

#379533
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36446) - you deserved it (161115)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML

#377584
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43509) - you deserved it (194072)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:02pm - misc - by natty (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent a solid four hours and over one hundred dollars preparing a nice fancy meal for my new girlfriend. A delicious three pound rack of ribs with a sweet and sour marinade. Steam broccoli with melted cheese. Home made buttermilk biscuits. I serve the meal. She doesn't eat beef. FML

#374506
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30132) - you deserved it (65709)

On 03/16/2009 at 5:55am - misc - by WhatdyaDo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

Today, I was rejected from the University of Washington. My dad has been a professor there for 30 years, and is on the board of admissions. FML

#366764
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (409115) - you deserved it (90578)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

#364382
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (190284) - you deserved it (29803)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

#364382
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (190284) - you deserved it (29803)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (694294) - you deserved it (463986)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74984) - you deserved it (17468)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (217099) - you deserved it (35397)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML

#341783
558 comments

I agree, your life sucks (527557) - you deserved it (35400)

On 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm - love - by thankskimi (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML

#334841
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64773) - you deserved it (15840)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: